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Subtitles downloaded from https://kickasssubtitles.com

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Ha ha ha ha ha! High-five!

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Hnnh!

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OK.

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Two, three...

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in a town called Kickapoo

7
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religious through and through

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there was a black sheep

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and he refused to step in line

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fucking rocking all the time

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and all the planets did align

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were blazing

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his fucking cockles

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fucked the dragon

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to fuck with me

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in the party zone

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in the party zone

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in the party zone

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in the party zone

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Aaaah!

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Why were you ever born?

27
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better than you

28
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29
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that you've played for us

30
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the depths of hell

31
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the Devil's work

32
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33
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a mindless puppet

34
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will pull the strings

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will lose direction

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you better watch your tone

38
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with no telephone

39
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don't let me hear you moan

40
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when you're in my home

41
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I am lost and so alone

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43
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from your throne?

44
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who will teach me how to rock

45
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but, man, he can suck a cock

46
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it's magical and rad

47
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I am stuck here with my dad

48
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brave young Jables

49
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50
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the ancient methods

51
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52
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father's clutches

53
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neighborhood

54
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to find the land of Hollywood

55
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meets the sand

57
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a strong alliance

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most awesome band

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fame and fortune

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you must walk

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from fucking Kickapoo

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to find the secrets of his art

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he would find his counterpart

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yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-hey-yeah

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Ten! Ten! Ten! Ten!

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is ten, is--

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This place is awesome.

82
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Gold man. Ha ha ha!

83
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Whoa!

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Ohhh! Oh, man!

85
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- Thank you.
- Oh, my God.

86
00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:54,500
OK, that was
the best thing I have ever seen.

87
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- Who are you?
- The name's Kyle Gass.

88
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Kyle Gass.

89
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Dude, will you just teach me
that one thing that you did?

90
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Where you're like, playing--

91
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I'm not giving
free guitar lessons today.

92
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Why don't you stand over there?

93
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Right here?

94
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You're awesome.

95
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This next piece
is by Johann Sebastian Bach--

96
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- Watch this.
- And it's entitled...

97
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Bourrée in E Minor.

98
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Check this out,
this guy's insane.

99
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Man, are you guys stupid.

100
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Don't you know genius
when you see it?

101
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Damn!

102
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Anyway.

103
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My name's JB.

104
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My name's JB.

105
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Just rolled into town.

106
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- Would you give me some space?
- Yeah.

107
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You're kinda cramping my style.

108
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Oh, dude, I'm sorry.

109
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And you're driving
away my crowd.

110
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If you just move back,
like I asked you earlier...

111
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I think things
are going to be a lot better.

112
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- OK. Fine. Sorry.
- Thanks.

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114
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115
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he's a shining golden god!

116
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117
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118
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119
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you've got to rock the block

120
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121
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you fucking school

122
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out of their jewels

123
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if you think it's time to

124
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it's time to fucking ro-ock

125
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126
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127
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his name is Kyle Gass

128
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129
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and fucking rolling

130
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rip-rip-dip-diddley-diddley

131
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dip, dip

132
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be-dop-bop-bop

133
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be-dop-bop-bop-boo!

134
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bip-bip-bip-biddle-biddle-boo

135
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boo, boo, boo!

136
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Bop-bop-bop-bop-bop

137
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bip, bip, bip, bip

138
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139
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Yeah!

140
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Dudes!

141
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That was bad-ass.

142
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You guys are like electric dynamite.

143
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What's the name of your band?

144
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We're not a band. They calls
me KG Solo Man Five Thousand...

145
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and I aims to keep it that way.

146
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- Aah!
- I'm outta here.

147
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This place is tapped.

148
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Jeez Louise, papa cheese.

149
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I know. It's OK.

150
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It's just part of his genius.

151
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to sleep tonight

152
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153
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and it's dark

154
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the way

155
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156
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157
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158
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Well. What do we 'ave 'ere?

159
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My little snuggles.

160
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- Ha ha ha!
- I spy a stinking, filthy fag!

161
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Snivelling, boo-hoo-hoo!

162
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:51,000
Like a wee baby!

163
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Ha ha ha!

164
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He does look like a fucking baby.

165
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Oh! Ha ha. Wee baby.

166
00:11:58,900 --> 00:12:01,800
Listen, fellas. I don't
wanna fight. So if you don't...

167
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Aaaah!

168
00:12:03,700 --> 00:12:06,400
Look at this. What is it?

169
00:12:06,400 --> 00:12:08,300
Needs a popping, my brother.

170
00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:09,600
- Ooh!
- Hey, no. Give me that back.

171
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:10,800
That's my lucky guitar pick.

172
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That's my lucky guitar pick. Ow!

173
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Ah! Argh! Ow!

174
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Ha ha ha!

175
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:23,300
Hey! Okay! Let's go!

176
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Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo! Ha ha ha!

177
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Heh heh heh! Ha ha ha!

178
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Ohh...

179
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That's right, run.

180
00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:47,200
Unless you want
some more of this! Aah!

181
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You saved me.

182
00:12:51,700 --> 00:12:54,200
Aah, that's all right.

183
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They had it coming.

184
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How can I repay you?

185
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:01,300
We'll work something out.

186
00:13:22,100 --> 00:13:24,200
This place is futuristic.

187
00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:28,800
Yeah, this is my pad, here.
Number four.

188
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,700
Not hard to remember.
Just think, "My door is four."

189
00:13:31,700 --> 00:13:34,000
Pretty cool.

190
00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:37,400
Wow. Nice pad.

191
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,800
You got this place all to yourself?

192
00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:42,900
Yeah. I try to keep it simple.

193
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This is where I stay when I write.

194
00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:46,400
It's quite, uh, minimalist.

195
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I don't like anything to get in
the way of my creative juices.

196
00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:50,300
Cool.

197
00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:52,200
I'm working on my solo album
right now.

198
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Aaaah.

199
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,100
Yeah, Kyle Gass Project.

200
00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:59,200
It's got some pretty, uh,
breakthrough shit on it.

201
00:13:59,300 --> 00:14:01,200
Trying to keep it
on the hush-hush, though.

202
00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:04,400
Man, if you need a singer,
I am so there.

203
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:05,400
Check it out.

204
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,200


205
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:10,900

but you know he's clean

206
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:14,800
It's a Ronnie James Dio song.

207
00:14:14,800 --> 00:14:17,300
Yeah. I know.

208
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:19,000
I helped write it.

209
00:14:19,100 --> 00:14:20,300
I jam with him all the time.

210
00:14:20,300 --> 00:14:22,000
No way!

211
00:14:22,000 --> 00:14:24,500
- You do not know Dio!
- Sure.

212
00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:26,900
I know all the dudes
from Sabbath.

213
00:14:28,900 --> 00:14:30,000
- Dude?
- Mm?

214
00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:34,900
Is there any way that
maybe I could audition...

215
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:36,600
to be in the Kyle Gass Project?

216
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,900
Hm. Maybe.

217
00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:40,600
Oh ho ho ho!

218
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:41,800
You gotta get your chops up,
though...

219
00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:44,300
if you wanna shred
with the big dogs, son.

220
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:45,400
You got a lot to learn.

221
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:49,200
Will you teach me your ways?

222
00:14:50,500 --> 00:14:52,700
I will teach you.

223
00:14:52,700 --> 00:14:55,400
Go ahead and sleep
on the power couch.

224
00:14:55,500 --> 00:14:57,100
Your training begins tomorrow.

225
00:14:57,100 --> 00:14:59,600
At the crack of noon!

226
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Um--

227
00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:04,600


228
00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,600


229
00:15:06,700 --> 00:15:08,100


230
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him in the ways of rock

231
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:12,100
Lesson number one.

232
00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:14,000
Power slide.

233
00:15:14,100 --> 00:15:18,300


234
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:22,400
It's just slidin' on your knees.

235
00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:23,600
Is it?

236
00:15:23,700 --> 00:15:26,700
Or is it the single
most powerful stage move...

237
00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:28,400
in any rocker's arsenal?

238
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:31,500
Oh.

239
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:35,100
Gimme a power slide.
Full throttle.

240
00:15:36,300 --> 00:15:37,800
No fear.

241
00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:39,700
I'll give you a power slide.

242
00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:46,100
- How'd that feel?
- Really good.

243
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:47,800
How did it look?

244
00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:49,300
Amazing...

245
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:50,700
...ly bad.

246
00:15:50,700 --> 00:15:53,600

mm-doodle-diddum-doo-doo

247
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:56,300


248
00:15:56,300 --> 00:15:59,000

help me, maybe

249
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,700

the Kyle Gass Project

250
00:16:01,700 --> 00:16:04,500

roodle-oodle doo

251
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:07,300


252
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,400
Hey, what's this check
for 200 bucks?

253
00:16:10,500 --> 00:16:12,900
Oh, gimme that.

254
00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:14,500
That's a royalty check.

255
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,600
Why's it say,
"I love you, pumpkin" on it?

256
00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,900
Well, um, it's the name
of a song.

257
00:16:19,900 --> 00:16:22,300
Big hit in Canada.

258
00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:24,100
Get back to work.

259
00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,500
Whoa, check out that superfox!

260
00:16:30,700 --> 00:16:33,200
Do you think you can
handle a woman like that?

261
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,900
I think so.

262
00:16:34,900 --> 00:16:36,800
Well, you'd better know so...

263
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,100
'cause there's gonna be
ten times hotter ones...

264
00:16:38,200 --> 00:16:39,900
backstage at the Kyle Gass Project.

265
00:16:39,900 --> 00:16:41,300
Really?

266
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:44,700
Sex is a crucial component
to the Kyle Gass Project.

267
00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:46,300
Now drop
and give me one cock push-up.

268
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:48,600
What's a cock push-up?

269
00:16:48,700 --> 00:16:50,700
What's a cock push-up?

270
00:16:50,700 --> 00:16:54,000
A cock push-up, my friend, is
where you lay on your stomach...

271
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,500
and lift yourself off the ground
with nuthin' but your boner.

272
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,500
No problem.

273
00:17:00,300 --> 00:17:02,400
The cock is a muscle.

274
00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:03,700
You gotta learn how to flex it.

275
00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:07,900
From now on, I want you to do
one cock push-up a day...

276
00:17:07,900 --> 00:17:09,200
every day.

277
00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:12,200
- It hurts my cock.
- Keep at it. You never know...

278
00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:14,800
when you'll need to fuck your way
out of a tight situation.

279
00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,000
Whoo!

280
00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:18,200

ding-a-ding-ding-ding

281
00:17:18,300 --> 00:17:20,900

with blinding speed

282
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,500

he'll plant the seed

283
00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:27,300

amongst his learned flock

284
00:17:27,300 --> 00:17:29,700


285
00:17:29,700 --> 00:17:32,400


286
00:17:32,400 --> 00:17:35,200

all of his lessons

287
00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:41,800

ancient secrets of his rock

288
00:17:44,300 --> 00:17:46,500
Aaaah.

289
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,400
Yeah.

290
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:50,200
Oh oh oh, yeah!

291
00:17:50,300 --> 00:17:52,400
I fucking did it!

292
00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:55,000
Oh, I did it!

293
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,400
Hey. Dude, you reached KG.

294
00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:03,200
You know what to do. Uhhh.

295
00:18:06,900 --> 00:18:09,200
Dude, pick up.

296
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:11,700
Dude, it's Jables. Pick up, man.

297
00:18:11,700 --> 00:18:14,400
- Yeah.
- Yeah! Ha ha ha!

298
00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:16,200
I did it, man. Check it out.

299
00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:17,500
You hear that?

300
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,000
The training is working, man.

301
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,700
I made ten whole bucks
with my rock!

302
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,700
Good. Go score me a dime bag.

303
00:18:22,700 --> 00:18:24,100
A what?

304
00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:26,000
Ten dollars' worth of weed.

305
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,800
Now, listen.
Go down to Wake and Bake Pizza...

306
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:30,700
Ask for Jojo.

307
00:18:30,700 --> 00:18:33,800
Tell him you want
the Bob Marley extra crispy.

308
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:34,900
He'll know
what you're talking about.

309
00:18:34,900 --> 00:18:36,500
All right, dude. Roger that.

310
00:18:36,500 --> 00:18:38,200
One extra crispy coming up!

311
00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:42,700
Stone Age man
now had the muscle power...

312
00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:47,500
and mental power necessary
to evolve to new heights.

313
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:50,000
He then found the means
to harness...

314
00:18:50,100 --> 00:18:52,900
an even greater energy source.

315
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,100
The animals and creatures around him.

316
00:18:59,100 --> 00:19:00,100
Hmm.

317
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:02,600
Animal power would give him the food...

318
00:19:02,700 --> 00:19:06,700
and transportation, the clothing
and entertainment...

319
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,900
- needed for his long journey.
- Dude, turn it to Channel 14.

320
00:19:09,900 --> 00:19:11,900
In Search of Sasquatch is on.

321
00:19:15,700 --> 00:19:19,400
When you are able to snatch
this remote from my hand...

322
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:22,000
you will be ready to choose
the channels we watch.

323
00:19:23,100 --> 00:19:24,900
Try to snatch it.

324
00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:39,700
Aah, fuck!

325
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:43,200
Patience, young grass smoker.
Patience.

326
00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:45,900
Welcome to the gig simulator.

327
00:19:45,900 --> 00:19:49,400
If you pass this test,
your training is complete.

328
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:53,200
You will be ready to audition
for the KGP.

329
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:54,300
The what?

330
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:55,900
Kyle Gass Project?

331
00:19:55,900 --> 00:19:57,200
Oh, right, right.

332
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,000
Hold on.

333
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:01,200
Aaah.

334
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,500
Here's your 'za. That'll be 15.50.

335
00:20:05,500 --> 00:20:07,400
- Cool.
- Hey.

336
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:10,000
Aren't you the guitar guy
from the boardwalk?

337
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,200
- Yeah.
- I'm Lee.

338
00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:14,900
- Kage.
- Whoa!

339
00:20:14,900 --> 00:20:18,100
You guys puttin' on a concert?
Can I watch?

340
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,200
- Half off the pie?
- Dealio.

341
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:23,700
Right on. Come on in.

342
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:27,200
Hu...

343
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:33,600
Um...I don't know
if that's such a good idea, KG.

344
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,400
Uh, I'd rather not do this
in front of strangers.

345
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:37,400
What do you think
it's going to be like...

346
00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:39,000
when we play the Coliseum?

347
00:20:39,100 --> 00:20:40,200
No strangers allowed?

348
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:41,900
OK.

349
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:44,200
Let the simulation begin.

350
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:46,100
Uh--Ha ha. All right.

351
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,900
So, should I sing a song?

352
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:52,600
Hey, sing something, douchebag!

353
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,700
OK.

354
00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:59,400
You know what? I wanna start
off--offstage and come out...

355
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,100
'cause that's the way
I like, imagine it.

356
00:21:02,100 --> 00:21:04,500
Just--just come
in from the wings.

357
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:08,500
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Kyle Gass Project!

358
00:21:08,500 --> 00:21:10,100
Aaaah!

359
00:21:12,300 --> 00:21:15,200
Hey, what's up? I'm JB
from the Kyle Gass Project.

360
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:18,300
Get on with it, dumb shit.

361
00:21:18,300 --> 00:21:21,200
All right, Kage,
let's do it, man. Two, three.

362
00:21:21,300 --> 00:21:24,300

is a-out of control!

363
00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:25,300


364
00:21:28,100 --> 00:21:30,300
Get off the stage,
you stupid dillweed.

365
00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:38,300

from a piece of coal

366
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:40,300


367
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,500
Boo!

368
00:21:43,500 --> 00:21:46,500
Boo! Boo!

369
00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:48,100
Boooo!

370
00:21:48,200 --> 00:21:50,700
Go back to Kickapoo,
you fat-ass momma's boy!

371
00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:52,400
Boo!

372
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:55,400

the secrets of the pumpkin patch

373
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:57,800
- Boo!
- Ow! Aah!

374
00:21:57,900 --> 00:22:00,000
- Boo!
- Urgh.

375
00:22:00,100 --> 00:22:01,700
Hey, that's really...

376
00:22:01,700 --> 00:22:06,900
- Hey! You suck!
- You suck! Suck! Suck!

377
00:22:06,900 --> 00:22:09,800
Jesus. You call that music?

378
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,600
You're nothing but a mistake.

379
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:13,500
I should have worn a condom.

380
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:15,600
I was not a mistake.

381
00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:17,400
Power slide.

382
00:22:21,900 --> 00:22:24,300
Aaagh! Aaah, aaah!

383
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:27,500
- He's had enough. Turn it off.
- Aagh. Aaaah!

384
00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,300
Lights!

385
00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:32,000
- Oooh.
- Hey, hey, it's OK.

386
00:22:32,100 --> 00:22:35,000
- I suck!
- You don't suck.

387
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,900
I broke my guitar!

388
00:22:36,900 --> 00:22:38,100
Monster mash!

389
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:41,100
Nobody passes the gig simulator
on the first time.

390
00:22:41,100 --> 00:22:43,500
Not even this guy.

391
00:22:43,500 --> 00:22:45,500
You didn't?

392
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,700
But then you did pass it later?

393
00:22:47,700 --> 00:22:51,200
I passed later, but, you know,
took me a couple of tries.

394
00:22:51,300 --> 00:22:54,100
- Oh, you did? I was doing...
- You know you can do it.

395
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:55,500
- It was going pretty good.
- Right.

396
00:22:55,500 --> 00:22:57,500
Until I got--until I got to the--

397
00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:58,800
When I messed up on that thing.

398
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:00,900
Let's clean this place up.
What do you say?

399
00:23:00,900 --> 00:23:04,300
And then we'll do bongloads
and play Maximum Overthruster.

400
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:06,100
- Hey, dude, it's KG.
- Do some bongloads?

401
00:23:06,100 --> 00:23:08,600
You know what to do. Uhhh.

402
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:10,800
Hi, pumpkin. It's your mother.

403
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:12,700
Your father and I have decided...

404
00:23:12,700 --> 00:23:17,000
that 15 years of trying to be a famous
musician is long enough.

405
00:23:17,100 --> 00:23:18,700
So I'm sorry to say...

406
00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,500
we aren't going to be sending
you any more rent checks.

407
00:23:20,500 --> 00:23:21,900
It's time to get a real job.

408
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,600
I love you, pumpki--

409
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:30,100
"I love you, pumpkin"?

410
00:23:30,100 --> 00:23:32,400
Those weren't royalty checks.

411
00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:35,500
I can't believe this machine, it's--

412
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:37,300
Let's watch TV, you wanna?

413
00:23:40,500 --> 00:23:42,300
You lied to me.

414
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:49,400
- You don't know Dio.
- Hey!

415
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:52,100
I think that In Search
of Sasquatch is on.

416
00:23:52,100 --> 00:23:54,300
- Hold on.
- Give me that fucking remote.

417
00:23:54,300 --> 00:23:56,600
No! Leave it!

418
00:23:56,600 --> 00:23:58,700
No!

419
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:00,800
Aaah!

420
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:02,400
- Ohhh!
- Aaah!

421
00:24:03,500 --> 00:24:05,900
Who are you?

422
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:09,000
Here's your lunch, pumpkin.

423
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,900
Thanks, Mom.

424
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,100
Oh! Mwah!

425
00:24:13,100 --> 00:24:14,200
I love you, pumpkin.

426
00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:25,100
- Hey, pumpkin!
- Ha ha ha!

427
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:27,300
Hah! What's with the hat, dude?

428
00:24:27,400 --> 00:24:29,200
Your mom sew that for you?
Ha ha ha!

429
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:31,900
Ha ha ha!

430
00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:35,400
- Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!
- Oh, my God!

431
00:24:35,500 --> 00:24:37,600
Your mom shine that for you
when you go to bed?

432
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:41,900
- Cue ball!
- Science experiment gone wrong!

433
00:24:41,900 --> 00:24:43,700
- Freakazoid!
- Ha ha ha!

434
00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:47,200
I'm fucking outta here.

435
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:55,500
Don't walk away from me!

436
00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,200
I fucking cleaned your apartment, man.

437
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,100
What are you doin'?

438
00:25:03,100 --> 00:25:05,000
Why are you packing?

439
00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:08,400
I have to go back to my mom and dad's.

440
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:12,200
I'm broke.

441
00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:13,800
I already spent the last rent check.

442
00:25:13,900 --> 00:25:16,200
Oh, you fucking dick!

443
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,500
What'd you spend the money on? Huh?

444
00:25:18,500 --> 00:25:21,000
An official professor bullshit degree?

445
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,100
What'd you spend the rent on?

446
00:25:32,500 --> 00:25:33,500
I got that for you.

447
00:26:31,900 --> 00:26:34,100
Stop packing, dude.

448
00:26:34,100 --> 00:26:36,900
We're gonna pay the rent...

449
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,900
with our rock.

450
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:41,600
- We are?
- Yeah.

451
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:45,100
But we're not gonna be called
the Kyle Gass Project.

452
00:26:45,100 --> 00:26:46,800
From now on...

453
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:50,400
we will be known as Tenac.

454
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:52,400
Tenac?

455
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,100
What's that?

456
00:26:54,100 --> 00:26:56,400
It's a sign.

457
00:26:56,500 --> 00:26:58,100
A legacy.

458
00:27:03,100 --> 00:27:05,900
I've had this birthmark since I was born.

459
00:27:06,900 --> 00:27:09,100
I looked it up in the dictionary.

460
00:27:10,500 --> 00:27:12,800
It's not in there.

461
00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:15,200
I never knew what the hell it meant.

462
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:17,700
Till now.

463
00:27:17,700 --> 00:27:20,000
It's the name of our fuckin' band, dude.

464
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:23,300
I have ass-mark too.

465
00:27:31,700 --> 00:27:33,300
You guys!

466
00:27:35,600 --> 00:27:37,000
Look!

467
00:27:43,300 --> 00:27:45,900


468
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,800


469
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:55,200


470
00:27:55,300 --> 00:28:05,000


471
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:11,900
But thaaaaat's my life.

472
00:28:15,700 --> 00:28:17,300
All right.

473
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:20,700
Neil Hamburger,
everybody, Neil Hamburger.

474
00:28:20,700 --> 00:28:22,700
Funny stuff.

475
00:28:22,700 --> 00:28:25,500
Uh, the next band
asked me to read this.

476
00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:28,200
"Since the beginning of time...

477
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:32,500
"'twas written in the stones
that one day, a band would come.

478
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,100
"Well, that band has come...

479
00:28:35,100 --> 00:28:37,700
"and now they're here
to come again...

480
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:40,300
"in your ear-pussies."

481
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,800
Ladies and gentlemen,
Tenacious D.

482
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,200
That was awesome,
the way you read that.

483
00:28:48,300 --> 00:28:49,500
Kage. Kage?

484
00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:51,700
Don't forget
to fucking bring the thunder.

485
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:51,900
- OK.
- Hey, what's up?

486
00:28:51,900 --> 00:28:53,200
- OK.
- Hey, what's up?

487
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,300
We're Tenacious D
and this is our first concert ever...

488
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:56,600
so it's kinda historical.

489
00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:59,600
And, um, we wrote this song that
gives you a little taste...

490
00:28:59,700 --> 00:29:00,900
of, like, the history of the band.

491
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:02,200
Let's fucking do it, Kage, go!

492
00:29:02,300 --> 00:29:05,700
This is a song called
The History Of Tenacious D.

493
00:29:05,700 --> 00:29:06,700
And it's not just
a list of bullshit...

494
00:29:06,700 --> 00:29:07,800
that we've done in the past.

495
00:29:07,800 --> 00:29:09,600
It's a chronicling of our rise.

496
00:29:09,700 --> 00:29:10,900
To power!

497
00:29:10,900 --> 00:29:13,700

on mighty steeds

498
00:29:13,700 --> 00:29:15,500


499
00:29:15,500 --> 00:29:18,200

with Jesus and his cross

500
00:29:18,300 --> 00:29:20,000


501
00:29:20,100 --> 00:29:21,700


502
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:27,200

we've climbed K2

503
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,400


504
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,800

space and time, my friends

505
00:29:31,900 --> 00:29:33,500


506
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,100


507
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,600

we'll never subside

508
00:29:40,600 --> 00:29:42,400

till the planets collide

509
00:29:42,500 --> 00:29:45,100

we do not ride

510
00:29:45,100 --> 00:29:47,300


511
00:29:47,300 --> 00:29:49,000


512
00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,100


513
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:54,500


514
00:29:54,500 --> 00:29:56,600


515
00:29:56,700 --> 00:29:58,900

and we don't care

516
00:29:58,900 --> 00:30:00,400


517
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:02,300


518
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:06,600


519
00:30:06,700 --> 00:30:08,800


520
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:10,200


521
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:13,400


522
00:30:13,500 --> 00:30:16,100


523
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:19,700


524
00:30:19,700 --> 00:30:22,200


525
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:25,800


526
00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,000


527
00:30:28,700 --> 00:30:32,100


528
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:34,400


529
00:30:34,500 --> 00:30:36,200


530
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,500


531
00:30:38,500 --> 00:30:40,800


532
00:30:40,900 --> 00:30:42,900


533
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:45,500
Yeah!

534
00:30:45,500 --> 00:30:47,200
Let's go!

535
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:49,700
Ha ha ha!

536
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,000
- Yeah!
- Yeah!

537
00:30:54,100 --> 00:30:55,400
You guys, wait for me outside.

538
00:30:55,400 --> 00:30:57,600
I'm gonna go talk to the big cheese.

539
00:30:57,600 --> 00:30:58,700
Good call.

540
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:02,600
So?

541
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:04,200
What'd you think?

542
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:05,900
It was OK.

543
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:07,400
- It was OK?
- Mm-hm.

544
00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:08,600
You were OK. We were kick-ass.

545
00:31:08,700 --> 00:31:10,900
And we're gonna totally win
that money next week...

546
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:12,600
at the open mic contest.

547
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:14,600
Well, good luck.

548
00:31:14,600 --> 00:31:17,100
You know there's a lot
of stiff competition, so...

549
00:31:17,100 --> 00:31:20,800
you might wanna think about
writing some new material.

550
00:31:24,100 --> 00:31:27,200
That was amazing. You guys
changed people's lives tonight.

551
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:29,000
I know, we were so awesome.

552
00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,800
Yeah, it was awesome.
Compared to bullshit.

553
00:31:31,900 --> 00:31:33,400
But compared to the greats?

554
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:37,300
To Zeppelin? To the Beatles?
To fucking Beethoven?

555
00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:40,300
True. We were kick-ass.

556
00:31:40,300 --> 00:31:42,800
But if the D's gonna
win that prize money...

557
00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:45,700
we're gonna have to write
a fucking masterpiece!

558
00:31:46,700 --> 00:31:47,900
Are you with me?

559
00:31:47,900 --> 00:31:49,400
Totally.

560
00:31:49,900 --> 00:31:50,900
Power hug.

561
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:04,400
Masterpiece.

562
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:07,400


563
00:32:07,500 --> 00:32:11,200

to pay the rent

564
00:32:12,300 --> 00:32:14,900
Do it!

565
00:32:14,900 --> 00:32:16,300
All right,
no more fucking around.

566
00:32:16,300 --> 00:32:18,500
Masterpiece is right in there.

567
00:32:18,600 --> 00:32:20,200
All we have to do is step
into that magic circle...

568
00:32:20,300 --> 00:32:21,700
and the masterpiece is ours.

569
00:32:21,700 --> 00:32:23,000
Are you ready?

570
00:32:23,100 --> 00:32:24,300
Are you ready
to write a fucking masterpiece?

571
00:32:24,300 --> 00:32:25,400
- 'Cause I sure the fuck am.
- Yeah!

572
00:32:25,500 --> 00:32:28,000
Let's go!

573
00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:29,400
What are you doing?
Go. Go. Play something.

574
00:32:29,500 --> 00:32:31,500
Go fast. The magic only lasts a second.

575
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,400
No, don't play fast.
I said start fast.

576
00:32:33,400 --> 00:32:34,900
But keep going, yes.

577
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,100
Try to make it prettier.
Prettier, prettier. Prettier.

578
00:32:37,100 --> 00:32:38,700
Stop judging yourself,
you're judging yourself.

579
00:32:38,700 --> 00:32:39,900
That's why that riff sucks.

580
00:32:39,900 --> 00:32:42,700
No fucking mental blocks.
Release the...

581
00:32:42,700 --> 00:32:44,100


582
00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:45,500
That's all right.

583
00:32:45,500 --> 00:32:47,000
Now, can you play a little
higher, higher, higher up?

584
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,500
Higher notes, higher notes,
higher notes, higher notes.

585
00:32:49,500 --> 00:32:52,000
Higher notes, higher notes,
can you play any higher notes?

586
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:53,200
Sorry, I didn't mean to yell.

587
00:32:53,300 --> 00:32:54,600
I'm not looking for anything specific...

588
00:32:54,700 --> 00:32:56,300
but that's definitely
the wrong part of the cosmos.

589
00:32:56,400 --> 00:32:58,800
I want it over here, in the
newer, hotter part. Like--

590
00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:01,400


591
00:33:01,400 --> 00:33:03,900

keep playing that riff

592
00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:07,300

get it on tonight, aah

593
00:33:07,300 --> 00:33:08,800
What are you doing?
Were we recording?

594
00:33:08,900 --> 00:33:10,500
Press record. Press record.

595
00:33:10,500 --> 00:33:12,300
Oh, God damn it, it's too late!

596
00:33:12,300 --> 00:33:14,100
- Ah. It was--
- God damn it, Kyle, we had it.

597
00:33:14,100 --> 00:33:16,900
We were right there in it
and you were too slow.

598
00:33:16,900 --> 00:33:19,600
You didn't remember to do shit,
you didn't do what I told you...

599
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,600
and things got crossed,
chakras were fucking exploded.

600
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:23,800
If we're gonna do this thing right...

601
00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:25,500
you gotta do what I tell you to do!

602
00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:28,200
Daaaah! Fa-gaah!

603
00:33:29,300 --> 00:33:30,800
I wanna write a masterpiece.

604
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:34,100
I know, dude. So do I.

605
00:33:37,700 --> 00:33:39,800
It's all right.

606
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:43,100
We've got writers' block,
it happens to the best of 'em.

607
00:33:43,100 --> 00:33:45,200
I mean, look at these guys.

608
00:33:45,300 --> 00:33:47,800
AC/DC. Van Halen.

609
00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:49,500
The Who!

610
00:33:49,500 --> 00:33:52,200
Why are you guys so awesome?

611
00:33:52,300 --> 00:33:54,500
What do you have
that we don't have?

612
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:57,700
Well, they all use
the same guitar pick.

613
00:33:59,100 --> 00:34:01,200
What?

614
00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:11,200
Looks like they all use
the same guitar pick.

615
00:34:13,200 --> 00:34:15,700
Holy shitballs.

616
00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:27,800
Too many picks.

617
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,400
Let's see.

618
00:34:33,300 --> 00:34:34,600
I don't think they have it.

619
00:34:34,700 --> 00:34:36,900
Let's talk to the dude. We might
have to special order it.

620
00:34:36,900 --> 00:34:40,300
Marcus, I need a price check
on Ernie Ball amp caster stat.

621
00:34:40,300 --> 00:34:41,800
Just be a second.

622
00:34:41,900 --> 00:34:43,100
Can I help you gentlemen?

623
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:46,300
Yeah, we're looking for
a guitar pick like this one.

624
00:34:53,100 --> 00:34:55,500
How'd you hear about this?

625
00:34:55,500 --> 00:34:56,900
What did Papardello tell you?

626
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:02,900
Uh--Ahem. We just noticed
that all these musicians...

627
00:35:02,900 --> 00:35:03,900
are using the same guitar pick--

628
00:35:03,900 --> 00:35:04,900
Okay ka-ssh!

629
00:35:09,700 --> 00:35:14,100
Jerry, do me a favor, uh, ring up
these amp casters for me.

630
00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:15,800
Thank you, my man.

631
00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:22,900
In here.

632
00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:33,100
We can talk in here.

633
00:35:33,100 --> 00:35:35,400
What you seek...

634
00:35:35,500 --> 00:35:37,200
is the Pick...

635
00:35:38,900 --> 00:35:40,300
of Destiny.

636
00:35:42,100 --> 00:35:44,500
I think there's
a light switch back here.

637
00:35:44,500 --> 00:35:46,500
No, dude, you don't...

638
00:35:48,300 --> 00:35:50,400
Grab a seat.

639
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:52,400
You two bozos
don't even realize it...

640
00:35:52,500 --> 00:35:53,800
but you just stumbled onto...

641
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:55,700
the darkest secret
in the history of rock.

642
00:35:55,700 --> 00:35:57,700
Go on.

643
00:35:57,700 --> 00:36:00,100
I actually saw it once.

644
00:36:00,100 --> 00:36:01,800
I used to be a guitar tech.

645
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:04,400
So one night, I'm working a gig
up in New Jersey or something.

646
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:05,800
Some real mediocre band.

647
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:08,000
Lead guitarist comes out,
starts shredding licks...

648
00:36:08,100 --> 00:36:09,900
way beyond his capabilities.

649
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:11,800
Like shit that had to be
coming from somewhere else.

650
00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:13,900
I noticed he was using a new pick.

651
00:36:13,900 --> 00:36:16,600
Weird-looking thing with horns on it.

652
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:19,500
Made of green ivory, or some shit.

653
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:21,900
It was the pick, it wasn't him.

654
00:36:21,900 --> 00:36:23,200
He didn't know what he had, though.

655
00:36:23,300 --> 00:36:25,100
End of the show, he flicks it
back into the audience.

656
00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:27,800
Some kid catches it.

657
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:29,600
Kid named Eddie.

658
00:36:29,600 --> 00:36:30,600
Eddie?

659
00:36:30,700 --> 00:36:32,200
Van Halen!

660
00:36:32,300 --> 00:36:33,900
Whoa.

661
00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:36,200
So I started researching it.

662
00:36:36,300 --> 00:36:40,200
Turns out this thing goes deeper
than I could have imagined.

663
00:36:40,300 --> 00:36:42,200
Way deeper.

664
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:44,900
Back to the Dark Ages.

665
00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,300
I moved to Rome. Quit my job.

666
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:48,800
Learned Latin.

667
00:36:48,900 --> 00:36:51,600
I gained the trust of the
night librarian at the Vatican.

668
00:36:51,600 --> 00:36:53,700
A gentleman named
Salvatore Papardello.

669
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:55,900
He turned me on to some shit
that you wouldn't believe.

670
00:36:55,900 --> 00:36:58,000
Check this out.

671
00:36:58,000 --> 00:37:00,100
It's an ancient scroll.

672
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:01,800
All in Latin.

673
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:04,500
I translated it. Took me six years.

674
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:06,900
Why didn't you just get a translator?

675
00:37:06,900 --> 00:37:09,300
And let him read it too?

676
00:37:12,100 --> 00:37:14,500
Listen to this.

677
00:37:14,500 --> 00:37:17,800
Long ago, a dark wizard
used his black magic...

678
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:19,200
to summon Satan himself.

679
00:37:20,300 --> 00:37:22,100
Satanus.

680
00:37:22,100 --> 00:37:23,900
That's Latin for Satan.

681
00:37:23,900 --> 00:37:25,800
A horrific battle ensued.

682
00:37:25,900 --> 00:37:28,600
But the great demon
was far too powerful.

683
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:30,600
Snakes!

684
00:37:30,700 --> 00:37:33,200
Finish me, foul beast!

685
00:37:33,300 --> 00:37:36,000
Luckily, a blacksmith
heard the beast's roars.

686
00:37:36,100 --> 00:37:38,300
No!

687
00:37:39,100 --> 00:37:40,400
Ow!

688
00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:42,900
Fuck! You chipped my tooth.

689
00:37:42,900 --> 00:37:44,300
I'm not complete.

690
00:37:44,300 --> 00:37:47,600
Venisti remanebis
donec denuo completus sis.

691
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:49,100
What does that mean?

692
00:37:49,100 --> 00:37:52,600
From whence you came
you shall remain...

693
00:37:54,200 --> 00:37:55,900
until you are complete again.

694
00:37:56,900 --> 00:37:58,300
Fuck you! No!

695
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:01,400
No! I'm not complete!

696
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,700
The demon was drawn back
into the fires of hell...

697
00:38:03,700 --> 00:38:07,600
and the dark wizard
was totally stoked to be alive.

698
00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:09,900
With a long draw on his hash pipe...

699
00:38:09,900 --> 00:38:12,900
the wizard devised a way
to repay the blacksmith.

700
00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:15,200
The blacksmith loved a fair maiden.

701
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:18,500
To gain her affection, he would
need a true master skill...

702
00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:21,100
that would leave the maiden
moist and wanting.

703
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,400
And so the wizard fashioned
the demon's tooth...

704
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:27,400
into a pick that would make
the blacksmith play...

705
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:30,400
only the most masterful
of melodies on his lute...

706
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:36,000
thereby winning the heart
of the maiden he loved.

707
00:38:37,300 --> 00:38:40,500
The secret of the pick died
with that blacksmith.

708
00:38:40,500 --> 00:38:41,800
And then...poof!

709
00:38:41,900 --> 00:38:45,100
All of a sudden it reappears
in the American South...

710
00:38:45,100 --> 00:38:47,600
at the turn of the century,
in Robert Johnson's fingers.

711
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,100
Spawns the birth of the blues.
And rock and roll.

712
00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:51,300
Of course.

713
00:38:51,300 --> 00:38:53,500
The pick is a tiny part
of the beast...

714
00:38:53,500 --> 00:38:55,800
so it has
supranatural qualities.

715
00:38:55,900 --> 00:38:59,100
- Supernatural?
- No, supra-natural.

716
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:02,600
That's like
a whole other level above super.

717
00:39:02,700 --> 00:39:04,300
Where is it now?

718
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:09,300
That's the last known photo
of the pick.

719
00:39:09,300 --> 00:39:10,700
That guitar was sold at auction.

720
00:39:10,700 --> 00:39:14,000
It now resides in the
Rock and Roll History Museum.

721
00:39:15,300 --> 00:39:17,300
That's where the POD is too.

722
00:39:17,300 --> 00:39:20,400
- The POD?
- The Pick of Destiny.

723
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:21,900
Oh.

724
00:39:21,900 --> 00:39:24,100
Why didn't you just go get it?

725
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:27,200
The Rock and Roll History Museum
is an impenetrable fortress.

726
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:31,700
You two bozos wanna steal
the Pick of Destiny...

727
00:39:31,800 --> 00:39:33,100
count me out.

728
00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:35,200
I already went down
that rabbit hole once.

729
00:39:35,300 --> 00:39:37,300
And I got news for you.

730
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:39,700
There's no cheese at
the end of that tunnel, buddy.

731
00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,300
All right, get outta here.
I told you enough already.

732
00:39:43,300 --> 00:39:45,200
C'mon, get outta here.

733
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:47,200
Man, I don't know what to say.

734
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:48,900
Shh.

735
00:39:49,000 --> 00:39:51,000
Just get outta my store.

736
00:39:53,700 --> 00:39:55,400
The Quest!

737
00:40:03,500 --> 00:40:06,000
Oh, my God! You guys!
What are you doin' here?

738
00:40:06,100 --> 00:40:08,100
- Come on in!
- Actually, we can't stay.

739
00:40:08,100 --> 00:40:09,500
We were hopin'
you'd do us a favor.

740
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:11,800
Anything you need, man.

741
00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:14,500
- Do you think it would be OK--
- We need your car.

742
00:40:14,500 --> 00:40:16,500
Oh.

743
00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:19,700
Um, well,
kinda need it for work.

744
00:40:19,700 --> 00:40:21,000
Listen, man.

745
00:40:21,100 --> 00:40:23,900
We've got a meeting
with the hugest president...

746
00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:26,500
of the most massive
record company in the business.

747
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:28,900
We need to meet him
in Sacramento tonight.

748
00:40:28,900 --> 00:40:30,300
Oh.

749
00:40:30,300 --> 00:40:32,100
Uh--

750
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:33,900
Well--

751
00:40:33,900 --> 00:40:35,200
All right.

752
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:36,800
Hey, what's up with this pedal?

753
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:38,200
That's my extra brake.

754
00:40:38,300 --> 00:40:41,000
I'm a pizza delivery guy
and a driving instructor.

755
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:43,900
I teach people how to drive
while I deliver 'zas.

756
00:40:43,900 --> 00:40:45,900
Ha ha ha! Good thinkin', man.

757
00:40:46,600 --> 00:40:47,900
Later.

758
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:55,800
Knock 'em dead
at the meeting, you guys.

759
00:40:58,900 --> 00:41:01,100
I can't stop thinkin'
about that fuckin' pick.

760
00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:03,800
You heard the guy. It's Satan's tooth.

761
00:41:03,800 --> 00:41:05,300
When we get that thing...

762
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:06,900
we're gonna win
that fuckin' prize money...

763
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,900
then we're gonna
dominate the world of rock.

764
00:41:10,900 --> 00:41:13,700
We're gonna be unstoppable, man.

765
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:16,400
Hmmm...

766
00:41:16,500 --> 00:41:18,500
Unstoppable.

767
00:41:18,600 --> 00:41:22,300
Unstoppable.

768
00:41:22,300 --> 00:41:24,500
Unstoppable.

769
00:41:24,500 --> 00:41:27,800
This, uh, next band
asked me not to read this...

770
00:41:27,800 --> 00:41:32,800
but, God damn it,
I'm going to read it anyway...

771
00:41:32,900 --> 00:41:34,500
because I wrote it...

772
00:41:34,500 --> 00:41:36,800
and it's the truth.

773
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,700
"I fucking love this band!"

774
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:44,500
They are the best band ever, period!

775
00:41:44,500 --> 00:41:50,600
Ladies and gentlemen, Tenacious D!

776
00:41:56,400 --> 00:41:57,600
Hey, what's up?

777
00:41:57,600 --> 00:42:01,600
Me and KG wrote this song
five minutes ago.

778
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:03,400
It's called Master Exploder.

779
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:29,100

ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh

780
00:42:29,100 --> 00:42:36,800


781
00:42:38,500 --> 00:42:41,500
-
-

782
00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:44,900
-
-

783
00:42:45,000 --> 00:42:47,400
-
-

784
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:49,700


785
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:59,700


786
00:43:09,900 --> 00:43:18,800


787
00:43:20,300 --> 00:43:21,300
Sorry.

788
00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:26,300
-
-

789
00:43:26,300 --> 00:43:29,800
-
-

790
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:40,000

all the ti-i-i-ime

791
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:01,600
-
-

792
00:44:01,700 --> 00:44:04,700
-
-

793
00:44:04,700 --> 00:44:13,600


794
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:21,900

ahh-ahh yeah!

795
00:44:25,300 --> 00:44:27,100
Woah!

796
00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:36,200
JB! JB! JB! JB!

797
00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:41,400
JB! JB! JB! JB! JB!

798
00:44:41,500 --> 00:44:43,400
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

799
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:45,500
- JB! JB! JB!
- JB. JB. JB.

800
00:44:45,500 --> 00:44:47,800
JB, wake up. JB, wake up!

801
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:51,800
Let's chow down, dude.

802
00:44:51,900 --> 00:44:53,600
- I'm starving.
- OK.

803
00:45:12,600 --> 00:45:14,100
You guys know what you want?

804
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,600
Hmm.

805
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:18,400
What do you recommend?

806
00:45:18,400 --> 00:45:20,300
I recommend
that you order some food.

807
00:45:21,500 --> 00:45:22,900
OK.

808
00:45:22,900 --> 00:45:28,600
Uh--Lemme have
the fried chicken and a steak...

809
00:45:29,500 --> 00:45:30,700
and the chicken-fried steak.

810
00:45:32,400 --> 00:45:33,800
Hello.

811
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:36,400
Um--What happened to your eye?

812
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:40,300
I burned it with a curling iron.

813
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:44,300
I'll have one small glass
of carrot juice.

814
00:45:44,400 --> 00:45:45,600
Yeah, we don't have that here.

815
00:45:45,700 --> 00:45:47,400
Then I will have nothing.

816
00:45:47,500 --> 00:45:49,100
Great.

817
00:45:52,900 --> 00:45:55,100
- Dude, what's the matter?
- Dude?

818
00:45:55,100 --> 00:45:56,900
Aren't you hungry?
You should eat somethin'.

819
00:45:56,900 --> 00:45:59,300
No. I never eat before a mission.

820
00:45:59,300 --> 00:46:00,800
It slows you down.

821
00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:03,300
I gotta be light on my feet
like a dancer.

822
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:05,200
Like a fuckin' ninja, dude.

823
00:46:05,300 --> 00:46:06,300
Now check this out.

824
00:46:06,300 --> 00:46:08,100
I'm gonna jump this fence here.

825
00:46:08,100 --> 00:46:09,600
OK? Like a gazelle.

826
00:46:09,700 --> 00:46:12,100
Then you come around
that fuckin' bend.

827
00:46:12,200 --> 00:46:14,700
God! Damn it, Kyle!

828
00:46:14,700 --> 00:46:16,600
If we're gonna do this,
you gotta stay focused.

829
00:46:16,700 --> 00:46:18,500
Eye of le tigre!

830
00:46:18,500 --> 00:46:19,600
Now check it out.

831
00:46:19,700 --> 00:46:22,800
You give me a fuckin' boost,
He-Man style.

832
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:25,200
And then we're gonna fuckin' do
a little mini-tiger roll...

833
00:46:25,300 --> 00:46:26,400
- And come on back.
- Oh, my God. Stop it!

834
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:28,000
I fuckin' pull your shit up.

835
00:46:28,100 --> 00:46:30,400
Dude, hold on. That's good stuff.

836
00:46:35,700 --> 00:46:38,200
You're right, he's coming over here.

837
00:46:40,800 --> 00:46:43,000
- Oh!
- Fuckin' dick squeezer.

838
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:00,800
Aaah!

839
00:47:06,500 --> 00:47:08,100
Uh--

840
00:47:15,100 --> 00:47:16,800
Hey...

841
00:47:18,100 --> 00:47:20,100
buddy.

842
00:47:20,100 --> 00:47:22,900
Heh heh heh.

843
00:47:22,900 --> 00:47:26,700
So, uh, what, uh, brings you...

844
00:47:26,700 --> 00:47:29,500
to this neck of the woods?

845
00:47:29,500 --> 00:47:32,300
Um--Ahem. We're just
on a little business trip.

846
00:47:32,300 --> 00:47:34,100
Mm.

847
00:47:34,100 --> 00:47:36,600
Are you, uh, going to, uh...

848
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:39,700
check out
the Rock and Roll History Museum?

849
00:47:39,700 --> 00:47:42,300
- The Rock and Roll what?
- History Museum.

850
00:47:42,400 --> 00:47:43,700
Oh, no. I don't even know
what you're talkin' about.

851
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:47,700
You just seem like
Rock and Roll types to me.

852
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:49,300
- Ha ha!
- Yeah, well, we're not.

853
00:47:49,300 --> 00:47:51,300
We're just
two fuckin' businessmen...

854
00:47:51,300 --> 00:47:52,900
on our way
to see some shit in Sacramento.

855
00:47:52,900 --> 00:47:55,200
- So, sorry.
- Hmm. Yes. Yes.

856
00:47:55,300 --> 00:47:57,800
I was just asking because...

857
00:47:57,900 --> 00:48:01,300
I noticed the guitars
in the back seat of your car.

858
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:03,800
Yeah, well, I said,
we're fuckin' businessmen.

859
00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:05,700
We sell guitars. So what?
Big deal. End of story.

860
00:48:05,700 --> 00:48:07,000
Check, please!

861
00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:08,300
You're sure you aren't planning...

862
00:48:08,300 --> 00:48:11,100
on breaking into
the Rock and Roll History Museum?

863
00:48:11,100 --> 00:48:13,200
Hey, gimme that back, man!

864
00:48:16,100 --> 00:48:17,800
Yeah, my buddy and I are in a band.

865
00:48:17,900 --> 00:48:20,600
I don't like to say the name,
but uh, we had some hits...

866
00:48:20,700 --> 00:48:22,500
And so, uh, they're inductin' us...

867
00:48:22,500 --> 00:48:25,000
into the Rock and Roll History Museum.

868
00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:26,900
- No way!
- Aaah.

869
00:48:26,900 --> 00:48:28,300
Way.

870
00:48:28,300 --> 00:48:30,400
Oh, my God. We're sitting
with someone famous?

871
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:31,900
Ah, we're just regular guys.

872
00:48:31,900 --> 00:48:35,900
I mean, uh,
we're just flesh and...bone.

873
00:48:49,200 --> 00:48:51,900
Let's just say you are planning...

874
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:54,600
on breaking into
the Rock and Roll History Museum.

875
00:48:55,800 --> 00:48:57,600
Maybe you are inexperienced...

876
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:01,700
and you get inside
and cry like little girl.

877
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:05,400
Maybe you don't have
what it takes to get the job done.

878
00:49:09,300 --> 00:49:11,200
'Scuse me.

879
00:49:13,200 --> 00:49:15,100
Man, God!

880
00:49:20,900 --> 00:49:23,400
Yeah. Damn.

881
00:49:37,700 --> 00:49:44,800
I was thinking maybe there
was something in that museum...

882
00:49:44,800 --> 00:49:47,000
you had a desire for.

883
00:49:48,200 --> 00:49:51,100
Maybe--

884
00:49:51,200 --> 00:49:52,800
Pick of Destiny!

885
00:49:58,100 --> 00:50:01,300
Our sorority is throwing
a huge bash tonight.

886
00:50:01,300 --> 00:50:03,400
You guys should totally come...

887
00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:05,000
and play some
of your songs at the party.

888
00:50:05,100 --> 00:50:07,300
We're just getting ready
to head over there right now.

889
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:09,300
Why don't you follow us over?

890
00:50:09,300 --> 00:50:11,100
You know what?

891
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:12,400
That sounds rad.

892
00:50:12,400 --> 00:50:14,500
We don't usually play private parties...

893
00:50:14,500 --> 00:50:18,800
but I think we can make
some dreams come true tonight.

894
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:20,600
Hee hee hee hee!

895
00:50:20,700 --> 00:50:22,100
I'll ride along with you.

896
00:50:22,200 --> 00:50:23,900
So you don't get lost.

897
00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:29,500
I tried to get
the Pick of Destiny once.

898
00:50:29,500 --> 00:50:32,800
I had it in my hands, too.

899
00:50:32,800 --> 00:50:36,200
But I was caught. Set off a laser.

900
00:50:36,200 --> 00:50:39,300
Security door came down on my leg.

901
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:41,400
- Cut it right off.
- Ooh.

902
00:50:41,500 --> 00:50:45,400
I would break in again
if I still had my leg.

903
00:50:47,900 --> 00:50:50,900
My leg. Oh, man.

904
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:55,100
I miss that sweet-ass leg of mine.

905
00:50:55,100 --> 00:50:57,500
Why are you telling me this?

906
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:05,200
I like you. I see the spark
in your eye that I once had.

907
00:51:05,200 --> 00:51:07,200
Let me show you something.

908
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:12,600
These are my plans.
They will help you, I promise.

909
00:51:12,700 --> 00:51:15,400
There are two air ducts on the roof.

910
00:51:15,500 --> 00:51:17,700
You must enter through there.

911
00:51:17,700 --> 00:51:19,500
Speak of this to no one!

912
00:51:20,600 --> 00:51:22,300
Wait.

913
00:51:22,300 --> 00:51:24,000
Wait, I have some questions.

914
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:25,300
Let me wipe.

915
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:26,400
Hold up, dude.

916
00:51:32,100 --> 00:51:35,400
Dude. I got some smokin' bettys
over there...

917
00:51:35,500 --> 00:51:36,800
and they want us to play a gig.

918
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:39,900
No. I just had the weirdest
conversation of my life.

919
00:51:39,900 --> 00:51:42,400
This guy just gave me
the perfect plan.

920
00:51:42,400 --> 00:51:43,900
Now, look.

921
00:51:44,000 --> 00:51:47,400
There's two air ducts on the roof.

922
00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:50,500
Dude. The party?

923
00:51:50,500 --> 00:51:52,200
Gettin' to play our own tunes?

924
00:51:52,300 --> 00:51:56,600
That blonde over there wants
to ride my wrinklestick, yo.

925
00:51:56,700 --> 00:51:59,300
Would you get your head out of
the fuckin' pussy-clouds, man?

926
00:51:59,300 --> 00:52:01,000
Who cares about these chicks?

927
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:03,100
There's gonna be ten times
hotter babes backstage...

928
00:52:03,200 --> 00:52:05,100
when we win album of the year.

929
00:52:05,100 --> 00:52:07,600
This pick is our ticket to genius.

930
00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:11,500
Dude. I can't believe you'd
pass by a gig opportunity...

931
00:52:11,500 --> 00:52:13,100
with some sweet-ass hotties--

932
00:52:13,200 --> 00:52:14,300
What, for this?

933
00:52:14,300 --> 00:52:16,700
Is this really
that important to you? Huh?

934
00:52:16,700 --> 00:52:19,200
We can still write a masterpiece
and win that dough.

935
00:52:19,300 --> 00:52:20,900
Maybe it would be better for the D...

936
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:23,000
if we worked on our songwriting...

937
00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:25,200
instead of relying on ancient bullshit, but--

938
00:52:25,300 --> 00:52:26,800
probably won't work anyway.

939
00:52:28,300 --> 00:52:30,000
What's it gonna be, Kyle?

940
00:52:30,100 --> 00:52:31,800
You have to decide.

941
00:52:32,700 --> 00:52:35,900
Tits or destiny?

942
00:52:39,100 --> 00:52:40,700
Tits.

943
00:52:49,500 --> 00:52:51,000
So, good luck, buddy.

944
00:52:51,000 --> 00:52:53,000
I hope it was worth it,
because we're done.

945
00:52:53,100 --> 00:52:54,400
You ruined it. Pick's mine.

946
00:52:54,500 --> 00:52:56,400
Fuck you. I don't fuckin' need you.

947
00:52:56,400 --> 00:52:58,800
Later, cock-ass!

948
00:53:03,300 --> 00:53:05,400
Uh, don't mind him. He--

949
00:53:05,500 --> 00:53:07,000
He's my butler.

950
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:08,800
Had to let him go for loafin'.

951
00:53:08,800 --> 00:53:10,200
He--he'll--he'll be fine.

952
00:53:10,300 --> 00:53:14,000
Excuse me, um, are you gonna
charge us for all the refills?

953
00:53:14,000 --> 00:53:16,500
No, you're so pretty,
you get everything for free.

954
00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:23,200
Well, that's a really good deal.

955
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:30,800


956
00:53:30,900 --> 00:53:31,900


957
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:33,700
It's just a five-mile walk.

958
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:36,400
I can walk that.
I don't need a car.

959
00:53:36,500 --> 00:53:38,600
I'll take the fuckin' shoelace express.

960
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:40,100
Aaaah!

961
00:53:40,100 --> 00:53:42,400
- Woo!
- Fuck you!

962
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,600


963
00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:53,100


964
00:53:53,100 --> 00:53:54,500


965
00:53:55,900 --> 00:53:58,700
- Where we goin'?
-

966
00:53:58,700 --> 00:54:01,900


967
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:03,700


968
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:06,700
Stop. Stop the music.

969
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:11,000
Everybody, we have got
a special surprise tonight.

970
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,700
We have brought with us someone...

971
00:54:13,700 --> 00:54:16,700
who just happens to be a rock star!

972
00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:18,700
Whoo!

973
00:54:18,800 --> 00:54:21,400
That's in town to be conducted...

974
00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:25,100
into the Rock and Roll History Museum.

975
00:54:25,200 --> 00:54:26,900
- Whoo!
- Yeah!

976
00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:30,800
And he promised to come here tonight...

977
00:54:30,800 --> 00:54:33,700
and play us a few of his hits.

978
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,400
- Oh--
- So...

979
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:37,300
- You know--
- Let's give it up!

980
00:54:37,300 --> 00:54:39,600
- Whoo!
- I don't have a guitar.

981
00:54:39,600 --> 00:54:41,800
I don't have my gui--
I don't have a guitar.

982
00:54:41,800 --> 00:54:43,700
- All right!
- Whoo!

983
00:54:43,700 --> 00:54:46,100
- All right, come on!
- One--

984
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:50,400
This is a song, um--

985
00:54:50,500 --> 00:54:52,000
I wrote with my partner.

986
00:54:52,700 --> 00:54:54,700
My f--former partner.

987
00:54:54,700 --> 00:54:57,400
And, uh, it's called
The History Of Tenacious D.

988
00:54:57,400 --> 00:54:59,400
- Whoo!
- Whoo!

989
00:54:59,500 --> 00:55:02,100
- Nice!
- Yeah!

990
00:55:08,300 --> 00:55:10,600


991
00:55:10,700 --> 00:55:11,900
Huh?

992
00:55:12,900 --> 00:55:15,300


993
00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:17,100
- That sucked.
- Yeah.

994
00:55:17,100 --> 00:55:19,900


995
00:55:19,900 --> 00:55:21,600
-
- Ha ha ha!

996
00:55:21,600 --> 00:55:23,800
- That sucked.
-

997
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:25,700


998
00:55:25,800 --> 00:55:27,600


999
00:55:32,000 --> 00:55:34,000
One more and that's it.

1000
00:55:38,000 --> 00:55:39,700
Aah.

1001
00:55:41,100 --> 00:55:42,700
It's a good thing
I found these mushrooms.

1002
00:55:42,700 --> 00:55:45,000
I was fucking starving.

1003
00:55:45,100 --> 00:55:47,800
Mmm. Mm.

1004
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:49,500
Aah.

1005
00:55:52,500 --> 00:55:54,500
This place is kinda...

1006
00:55:57,900 --> 00:55:59,600
juicy.

1007
00:56:01,800 --> 00:56:05,500
Zzzzzhing!

1008
00:56:19,100 --> 00:56:21,000
Ha ha ha!

1009
00:56:28,900 --> 00:56:30,700
Hee hee!

1010
00:56:38,400 --> 00:56:41,800
Oh, my God! Sasquatch!

1011
00:56:41,800 --> 00:56:44,100
Aaaah!

1012
00:56:44,100 --> 00:56:47,100
Jables! What's up?

1013
00:56:47,100 --> 00:56:48,400
Ho ho ho!

1014
00:56:48,500 --> 00:56:51,000
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1015
00:56:51,600 --> 00:56:54,200
What are you doin' out here?

1016
00:56:54,300 --> 00:56:56,700
I was just walkin'
in your beautiful forest.

1017
00:56:56,700 --> 00:56:59,900
Oh, it's not my fowest, bwother.

1018
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,100
It's evewyone's.

1019
00:57:02,200 --> 00:57:03,800
You're so fuckin' awesome.

1020
00:57:03,800 --> 00:57:06,700
I love yoooou!

1021
00:57:06,800 --> 00:57:08,600
I love you too, JB.

1022
00:57:08,700 --> 00:57:11,100
You're a awesome rocker.
Ha ha ha!

1023
00:57:11,100 --> 00:57:13,200
Whoo!

1024
00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:15,700
- Let's pway!
- Ha ha ha!

1025
00:57:15,800 --> 00:57:18,400
Aaaah!

1026
00:57:18,500 --> 00:57:21,300
Aaaaah-oooh!

1027
00:57:21,400 --> 00:57:22,800
That's good.

1028
00:57:22,800 --> 00:57:25,000
- Let's go on a adventure.
- Yeah!

1029
00:57:25,100 --> 00:57:28,300
I got lots to show you.

1030
00:57:28,400 --> 00:57:30,600
Can I be a Sasquatch too?

1031
00:57:31,900 --> 00:57:34,400
You alweady are.

1032
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:36,900
You're my son, JB.

1033
00:57:36,900 --> 00:57:39,100
My widdle baby Sass.

1034
00:57:39,200 --> 00:57:41,200


1035
00:57:41,300 --> 00:57:43,600


1036
00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:44,600
Oh!

1037
00:57:44,700 --> 00:57:47,300
Let's take a dip
in the stwawberry wiver!

1038
00:57:47,300 --> 00:57:49,100
- Yay!
- Come on!

1039
00:57:49,100 --> 00:57:50,100
Oooh!

1040
00:57:50,100 --> 00:57:51,800


1041
00:57:54,400 --> 00:57:58,200
Ohhhh! Yeah. This is fun.

1042
00:57:59,200 --> 00:58:01,200
Ohhh!

1043
00:58:01,300 --> 00:58:04,900
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1044
00:58:04,900 --> 00:58:07,100
Good times.

1045
00:58:07,100 --> 00:58:08,400
- This is fun.
- Good times.

1046
00:58:08,500 --> 00:58:11,000
This is--This is super fun!

1047
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:17,000
Ha ha ha!

1048
00:58:17,100 --> 00:58:19,100
Ohhh!

1049
00:58:19,100 --> 00:58:21,000
Ha ha! Daddy, look. Look.

1050
00:58:21,000 --> 00:58:22,400
It's stuck to my butt.

1051
00:58:22,400 --> 00:58:25,900
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1052
00:58:26,000 --> 00:58:28,000
Shake your tushie, it'll fall off.

1053
00:58:28,100 --> 00:58:30,200
- Aah!
- Oh!

1054
00:58:30,300 --> 00:58:32,600
Let's get wid of these.

1055
00:58:34,700 --> 00:58:36,700
- Ah!
-

1056
00:58:36,700 --> 00:58:39,300
- Time to fly.
- Yeah.

1057
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:42,500
- Whee.
- Ha ha ha! Whee!

1058
00:58:42,600 --> 00:58:46,400
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1059
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:46,500
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1060
00:58:46,500 --> 00:58:50,300
- Hee hee! Hee hee hee!
- We're flying!

1061
00:58:50,300 --> 00:58:52,700
- We're flying!
- Hold on, boy!

1062
00:58:52,800 --> 00:58:54,900


1063
00:58:54,900 --> 00:58:56,900


1064
00:58:56,900 --> 00:59:01,500

that he's got to protect

1065
00:59:01,500 --> 00:59:03,800


1066
00:59:03,900 --> 00:59:05,700

that Sass can fly

1067
00:59:05,700 --> 00:59:10,500

and he's going to protect me!

1068
00:59:10,600 --> 00:59:12,300


1069
00:59:12,400 --> 00:59:14,400


1070
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:19,100

and he's got to protect me!

1071
00:59:19,100 --> 00:59:21,000


1072
00:59:21,100 --> 00:59:22,700


1073
00:59:22,700 --> 00:59:26,800

and he wants to protect--

1074
00:59:26,800 --> 00:59:28,500


1075
00:59:29,800 --> 00:59:32,500
Do you know where
I can find the Pick of Destiny?

1076
00:59:32,500 --> 00:59:35,900
Sure! It's right over there!

1077
00:59:36,000 --> 00:59:37,500
Oh! Let's get it!

1078
00:59:37,600 --> 00:59:40,800
I can get it if I surf on your--

1079
00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:43,500
Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

1080
00:59:44,700 --> 00:59:46,600
Aaaah! Sweet baby!

1081
00:59:47,700 --> 00:59:52,100
Oh! Aaah! Aaah! Aaah! Aaah!

1082
00:59:52,200 --> 00:59:53,600
Ow!

1083
00:59:55,700 --> 00:59:57,200
Oh, God!

1084
00:59:58,400 --> 01:00:00,300
Hoo hoo hoo!

1085
01:00:00,400 --> 01:00:02,600
Oh! Oh, God.

1086
01:00:06,000 --> 01:00:07,400
Oh, God.

1087
01:00:07,500 --> 01:00:09,600
Where the fuck am I?

1088
01:00:12,600 --> 01:00:14,100
Yeah, you motherfucker.

1089
01:00:14,100 --> 01:00:15,300
I'm gonna get that son--

1090
01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:34,300


1091
01:00:34,300 --> 01:00:36,700


1092
01:00:36,700 --> 01:00:40,500


1093
01:00:40,500 --> 01:00:42,300


1094
01:00:42,400 --> 01:00:44,900


1095
01:00:45,000 --> 01:00:47,700


1096
01:00:47,800 --> 01:00:52,700


1097
01:00:54,000 --> 01:00:57,600

and special times

1098
01:00:57,600 --> 01:01:03,200

the fucked up thing you do

1099
01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:07,900


1100
01:01:07,900 --> 01:01:10,100


1101
01:01:10,200 --> 01:01:14,900

all the time

1102
01:01:16,900 --> 01:01:21,300


1103
01:01:22,700 --> 01:01:26,900


1104
01:01:29,700 --> 01:01:32,500


1105
01:01:32,500 --> 01:01:37,100
-
- Ha ha ha!

1106
01:01:37,200 --> 01:01:38,600
Did you see that?

1107
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,400
- That was awesome.
-

1108
01:01:40,500 --> 01:01:43,100
- That was great.
-

1109
01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:48,500

all the time

1110
01:01:50,700 --> 01:01:55,300


1111
01:02:07,300 --> 01:02:08,800


1112
01:02:08,900 --> 01:02:10,200


1113
01:02:10,200 --> 01:02:12,900


1114
01:02:12,900 --> 01:02:15,700

flat as a pancake

1115
01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:18,400


1116
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,900


1117
01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:24,600


1118
01:02:24,700 --> 01:02:27,000


1119
01:02:27,100 --> 01:02:30,500


1120
01:02:31,600 --> 01:02:32,800


1121
01:02:32,800 --> 01:02:35,400
-
-

1122
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:38,500
-
-

1123
01:02:38,500 --> 01:02:40,900


1124
01:02:40,900 --> 01:02:43,400


1125
01:02:43,500 --> 01:02:46,900


1126
01:02:46,900 --> 01:02:48,100
- ...me, I elbow him--
- One guy?

1127
01:02:48,200 --> 01:02:49,200
He's tryin' to punch me in the neck.

1128
01:02:49,200 --> 01:02:50,900
- Yeah.
- I look down...

1129
01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:53,300
and there's two guys goin',
"I'm--We're gonna punch you."

1130
01:02:53,400 --> 01:02:54,800
So they're punchin' up at me...

1131
01:02:54,900 --> 01:02:57,000
I got both elbows down like this.

1132
01:02:57,100 --> 01:02:58,200
Pull both their hair...

1133
01:02:58,300 --> 01:03:00,100
and I made them both
poke each other's eyes out.

1134
01:03:00,100 --> 01:03:02,000
So they're both blind,
there's blood everywhere--

1135
01:03:02,000 --> 01:03:05,100


1136
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:07,600


1137
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:09,600
What the fuck?

1138
01:03:12,900 --> 01:03:15,600


1139
01:03:15,600 --> 01:03:18,400


1140
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:20,300
- Fuck!
-

1141
01:03:21,900 --> 01:03:24,800


1142
01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:27,300


1143
01:03:28,300 --> 01:03:32,000


1144
01:03:32,800 --> 01:03:33,500
Ow!

1145
01:03:33,600 --> 01:03:37,200
God damn it! Aah!

1146
01:03:37,200 --> 01:03:37,500
God! That was KG's fault.

1147
01:03:37,500 --> 01:03:39,700
God! That was KG's fault.

1148
01:03:39,700 --> 01:03:41,300
If he'd been here
like we planned...

1149
01:03:41,400 --> 01:03:42,500
he coulda lowered me down
with a rope...

1150
01:03:42,500 --> 01:03:44,300
but dick-ass
had to follow his cock.

1151
01:03:44,300 --> 01:03:48,600
And you know when I go quadruple
plat he'll come a-knockin'--

1152
01:03:48,600 --> 01:03:51,700
"Dude, can I come back
and join the band now?"

1153
01:03:51,700 --> 01:03:54,000
And I'll be like,
"No way, cockshiner."

1154
01:03:54,000 --> 01:03:55,500
And then he'll be like--

1155
01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:56,500
Can you hear me?

1156
01:03:56,600 --> 01:03:58,800
Oh, yeah.
I hear you loud and clear.

1157
01:03:58,800 --> 01:04:00,400
You're sayin' ho's before bro's.

1158
01:04:00,500 --> 01:04:02,300
Well, that's not how I roll, asshole.

1159
01:04:02,400 --> 01:04:05,800
JB, it's KG. Do you read me?

1160
01:04:08,700 --> 01:04:10,600
What do you want, non-rocker?

1161
01:04:10,600 --> 01:04:12,700
This line is reserved for rockers only...

1162
01:04:12,700 --> 01:04:14,700
so I can't really talk
to you right now.

1163
01:04:14,700 --> 01:04:17,700
Sex, drugs, and then rock and roll.

1164
01:04:17,800 --> 01:04:19,700
In that order.
I was just followin' the code.

1165
01:04:19,800 --> 01:04:21,400
You're a fuckin' traitor.

1166
01:04:21,400 --> 01:04:23,200
You bailed on me,
and now I'm in the shit.

1167
01:04:23,200 --> 01:04:25,400
Where the fuck are you?

1168
01:04:27,500 --> 01:04:29,500
I'm in the air duct, dude.

1169
01:04:33,300 --> 01:04:38,700
- Dude. I totally missed you.
- Me too.

1170
01:04:52,100 --> 01:04:53,500
I just heard a noise.

1171
01:04:53,500 --> 01:04:56,100
I am trippin'.

1172
01:04:56,100 --> 01:04:58,000
Are you stoned?

1173
01:04:58,100 --> 01:04:59,900
Listen.

1174
01:05:02,000 --> 01:05:04,600
Uh, I just heard a noise.

1175
01:05:04,600 --> 01:05:06,300
- I'm gonna go check it out.
- Copy that.

1176
01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:08,000
Mm.

1177
01:05:29,000 --> 01:05:30,900
Uh--

1178
01:05:34,300 --> 01:05:36,600
Classic Rock is clear.

1179
01:05:36,600 --> 01:05:38,500
I'm gonna go check out Punk.

1180
01:05:38,600 --> 01:05:40,500
And if I find anybody in there...

1181
01:05:40,600 --> 01:05:43,300
I'm gonna pop a fuckin' cap
in their ass.

1182
01:05:43,400 --> 01:05:45,100
I'm gonna call it self-defense.

1183
01:05:45,100 --> 01:05:46,800
Hello?

1184
01:05:48,500 --> 01:05:49,700
I'm on my own.

1185
01:06:00,700 --> 01:06:02,900
Oh, God.

1186
01:06:05,700 --> 01:06:06,900
Dude, you heard that guy.

1187
01:06:07,000 --> 01:06:08,500
He's gonna shoot us. Let's bail.

1188
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:10,500
No. We're too close.

1189
01:06:10,500 --> 01:06:11,800
That pick is in one of these rooms...

1190
01:06:11,800 --> 01:06:13,600
and we're not leavin' here
without it.

1191
01:06:13,600 --> 01:06:15,200
Dude, look at this place.

1192
01:06:15,200 --> 01:06:17,500
It's huge. We're never
gonna find this thing.

1193
01:06:17,600 --> 01:06:20,600
Follow me. We are the shadows.

1194
01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:23,200
They'll never find what cannot be seen.

1195
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:06,900
Center.

1196
01:07:09,700 --> 01:07:11,000
Picks, picks.

1197
01:07:11,100 --> 01:07:13,400
Where do they keep their fuckin' picks?

1198
01:07:13,500 --> 01:07:15,000
It's gotta be in the Guitar Gods room.

1199
01:07:15,100 --> 01:07:16,600
- Where's that?
- It's right here.

1200
01:07:16,600 --> 01:07:19,300
At the top of Guitarway to Heaven.

1201
01:08:00,800 --> 01:08:02,200
There it is.

1202
01:08:06,300 --> 01:08:09,400
Fuck-a-luck-a-ding-dong.

1203
01:08:09,400 --> 01:08:11,000
- Let's go get it.
- No!

1204
01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:14,100
Lasers.

1205
01:08:14,200 --> 01:08:16,100
They'll slice you to pieces.

1206
01:08:16,200 --> 01:08:17,600
Sizzlelean.

1207
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:21,300
You stay here and keep a lookout.

1208
01:08:21,300 --> 01:08:24,200
Wh--What are you gonna do?

1209
01:08:24,300 --> 01:08:26,700
I'm goin' in there and gettin' that pick.

1210
01:08:30,300 --> 01:08:31,900


1211
01:08:33,700 --> 01:08:35,700


1212
01:08:37,000 --> 01:08:38,700


1213
01:08:40,100 --> 01:08:41,500


1214
01:08:41,500 --> 01:08:43,700
Be careful.

1215
01:08:43,800 --> 01:08:45,400


1216
01:08:47,300 --> 01:08:48,600


1217
01:08:49,200 --> 01:08:50,200
Uh! Uh!

1218
01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:52,900


1219
01:08:52,900 --> 01:08:55,700


1220
01:08:57,500 --> 01:08:58,800


1221
01:08:58,900 --> 01:09:00,600


1222
01:09:00,600 --> 01:09:01,900


1223
01:09:02,000 --> 01:09:03,100
You got it.

1224
01:09:04,300 --> 01:09:05,300


1225
01:09:06,200 --> 01:09:07,200


1226
01:09:09,700 --> 01:09:13,100
Can't...reach...pick.

1227
01:09:13,200 --> 01:09:15,400
Surrounded by lasers.

1228
01:09:15,500 --> 01:09:16,800
Focus, Jables.

1229
01:09:18,700 --> 01:09:21,200
Use all your mental powers.

1230
01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:25,300
Wait.
There's a button down here.

1231
01:09:27,000 --> 01:09:29,000
I think it might deactivate the lasers...

1232
01:09:29,900 --> 01:09:32,000
But I can't reach it.

1233
01:09:32,100 --> 01:09:33,500
The cock.

1234
01:09:34,800 --> 01:09:36,400
Use the cock.

1235
01:09:48,500 --> 01:09:50,700
Come on, helmet head.

1236
01:09:50,700 --> 01:09:51,900
Get it up.

1237
01:09:51,900 --> 01:09:53,500


1238
01:09:55,900 --> 01:09:58,000
Ooh.

1239
01:09:58,800 --> 01:10:01,600


1240
01:10:02,700 --> 01:10:04,500


1241
01:10:04,600 --> 01:10:06,400
Aaah! Mmm!

1242
01:10:06,400 --> 01:10:09,500
-
- Come to Papa.

1243
01:10:09,600 --> 01:10:11,900
-
- Oh! Aaah!

1244
01:10:11,900 --> 01:10:13,600
Oh, yeah!

1245
01:10:25,700 --> 01:10:27,800
Let's finish this.

1246
01:10:33,400 --> 01:10:35,500

hey, hey, hey, hey

1247
01:10:35,500 --> 01:10:37,800

ba-dum-biddly-beep-beep

1248
01:10:38,900 --> 01:10:41,100
Aaaah!

1249
01:10:41,100 --> 01:10:42,400
Fuck.

1250
01:10:42,500 --> 01:10:43,600
I can't reach it.

1251
01:10:43,700 --> 01:10:45,600
- I can't reach it.
- Hold on!

1252
01:10:46,700 --> 01:10:48,400
Aaaah!

1253
01:10:49,800 --> 01:10:51,600
That's it, that's it.

1254
01:10:51,600 --> 01:10:53,200
I got it! I got it! Aaah!

1255
01:10:53,200 --> 01:10:54,700
- Aaah! Aaah!
- Aaaah!

1256
01:10:58,600 --> 01:11:02,300
Ah! Aaah! Oh! Aaah!

1257
01:11:04,000 --> 01:11:05,400
- Uh...
- Oh!

1258
01:11:05,400 --> 01:11:08,500
Ha ha ha ha!

1259
01:11:09,100 --> 01:11:10,100
Aaaaaah!

1260
01:11:12,900 --> 01:11:14,500
Haul ass!

1261
01:11:18,300 --> 01:11:20,200
Aaaaaah!

1262
01:11:21,000 --> 01:11:22,700
Aaaaaah!

1263
01:11:27,000 --> 01:11:29,000
Stop! Stop!

1264
01:11:34,400 --> 01:11:35,400
Aaaah!

1265
01:11:40,300 --> 01:11:45,200
Power slide!

1266
01:11:47,700 --> 01:11:51,600


1267
01:12:02,100 --> 01:12:05,700
- Oh, damn!
- Ugh! Why?

1268
01:12:07,500 --> 01:12:09,200
- That was awesome.
- I know.

1269
01:12:09,200 --> 01:12:11,100
I've never fired a gun before,
it was unbelievable.

1270
01:12:11,200 --> 01:12:13,300
Aah! Oh, God! Oh!

1271
01:12:13,300 --> 01:12:15,000
Oh! Hold up!

1272
01:12:16,900 --> 01:12:18,600
- We got it!
- Fuck, yeah.

1273
01:12:18,700 --> 01:12:19,900
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1274
01:12:19,900 --> 01:12:23,500
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha!

1275
01:12:23,500 --> 01:12:25,500
Nice work, boys.

1276
01:12:25,500 --> 01:12:31,200
Now, toss that pick over here,
nice and slow.

1277
01:12:31,200 --> 01:12:34,700
Or I will cut you from hole to hole.

1278
01:12:34,700 --> 01:12:37,100
Then you might as well kill us, man...

1279
01:12:37,100 --> 01:12:38,600
'cause there is no way in hell...

1280
01:12:38,700 --> 01:12:40,100
we're givin' you this fuckin' pick.

1281
01:12:40,100 --> 01:12:42,100
OK.

1282
01:12:42,200 --> 01:12:44,400
So be it.

1283
01:12:44,400 --> 01:12:46,600
Come over here.

1284
01:12:46,600 --> 01:12:48,700
I'm going to fucking stab you.

1285
01:12:50,100 --> 01:12:52,700
What?

1286
01:12:52,700 --> 01:12:54,700
No. We're not comin' over there.

1287
01:12:54,800 --> 01:12:56,500
Fine.

1288
01:12:56,600 --> 01:12:59,100
Stay where you are, then.

1289
01:12:59,100 --> 01:13:00,800
I'm going to come over there.

1290
01:13:00,900 --> 01:13:05,800
I am going to slice out
your eyes and your balls.

1291
01:13:05,800 --> 01:13:09,700
And then I am going to stick
your eyes in your ballsacks...

1292
01:13:09,700 --> 01:13:11,300
and then I will take your balls...

1293
01:13:11,300 --> 01:13:13,800
and I will put them in your eyeholes!

1294
01:13:13,900 --> 01:13:15,500
Dude, we could totally outrun him.

1295
01:13:15,500 --> 01:13:17,100
Totally, let's bail.

1296
01:13:17,100 --> 01:13:20,100
N--No, wait! Co--Come back here!

1297
01:13:20,100 --> 01:13:21,200
Wow!

1298
01:13:21,200 --> 01:13:23,300
Come back with my pick!

1299
01:13:24,200 --> 01:13:25,600
It belongs to me!

1300
01:13:27,100 --> 01:13:28,600
Freeze!

1301
01:13:29,700 --> 01:13:32,800
Catch me if you can.

1302
01:13:35,400 --> 01:13:36,400
Aaaah!

1303
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:41,400


1304
01:13:42,300 --> 01:13:46,300
Yeah! Yeah!

1305
01:13:47,700 --> 01:13:49,900
Whoo!

1306
01:13:49,900 --> 01:13:52,000
Fifty miles to Los Angeles.

1307
01:13:52,000 --> 01:13:53,000
- We did it!
- Yeah!

1308
01:13:53,000 --> 01:13:54,200
- Yeah!
- I know.

1309
01:13:54,200 --> 01:13:55,900
I'm surprised no one even chased us.

1310
01:13:55,900 --> 01:13:57,200
We got away scot-free.

1311
01:13:57,200 --> 01:13:59,800
- You fuckin' rule.
- No. You fuckin' rule.

1312
01:13:59,800 --> 01:14:02,900
Yeah, but I couldn't have done it
without your training.

1313
01:14:02,900 --> 01:14:05,000
Dude, let's see the pick.

1314
01:14:05,100 --> 01:14:06,800
- Oh, shit.
- Dude, you got it, right?

1315
01:14:06,800 --> 01:14:08,700
Yes! Ha ha ha!

1316
01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:10,400
- Look at how awesome it is!
- Ohhhh!

1317
01:14:10,500 --> 01:14:12,000
- Now we have the power.
- Yes!

1318
01:14:12,000 --> 01:14:14,500
We shall carry on its ancient legacy.

1319
01:14:14,500 --> 01:14:17,200
Dude, we are gonna smoke
the competition...

1320
01:14:17,300 --> 01:14:18,500
at the open mic night tonight.

1321
01:14:18,500 --> 01:14:20,500
- That money is ours!
- Mm. Totally.

1322
01:14:23,400 --> 01:14:26,100
Yeah, I got some, uh, fellas
with a broken taillight.

1323
01:14:27,500 --> 01:14:28,800
- Oh, fuck. It's the cops.
- Is it? Oh... Oo.

1324
01:14:28,800 --> 01:14:30,500
Pull over. Pull over. It's cool.

1325
01:14:30,500 --> 01:14:31,600
- OK.
- Pull over.

1326
01:14:32,500 --> 01:14:34,200
All right. Just play it cool.

1327
01:14:34,300 --> 01:14:36,300
M'kay? They got nothin' on us.

1328
01:14:36,400 --> 01:14:38,800
Let's just be mellow, OK?

1329
01:14:41,700 --> 01:14:43,200
What're you doing? No!

1330
01:14:43,200 --> 01:14:45,200
What the fuck are you doing?

1331
01:14:45,200 --> 01:14:46,900
This is Officer Mackenzie,
I need backup.

1332
01:14:46,900 --> 01:14:49,200
Assailants turning south
down Lexington Avenue.

1333
01:14:49,200 --> 01:14:50,200
I'm in pursuit.

1334
01:14:50,200 --> 01:14:52,600
Oh, God damn it, Kyle!

1335
01:14:52,600 --> 01:14:54,300

that's the name of the game

1336
01:14:54,400 --> 01:14:55,400
- I want out!
-

1337
01:14:55,400 --> 01:14:56,600


1338
01:14:56,700 --> 01:14:58,500

blew a synapse

1339
01:14:58,600 --> 01:15:00,800

for a total collapse

1340
01:15:00,900 --> 01:15:02,500

run away from the fuzz

1341
01:15:02,500 --> 01:15:04,700

but we totally was

1342
01:15:04,700 --> 01:15:06,400

now we're off-a the map

1343
01:15:06,500 --> 01:15:08,100

now we're takin' a crap

1344
01:15:08,200 --> 01:15:09,600
-
- Oh, fuck!

1345
01:15:09,600 --> 01:15:10,800
-
- God damn it!

1346
01:15:10,800 --> 01:15:12,300

the power of D

1347
01:15:12,400 --> 01:15:14,400


1348
01:15:14,400 --> 01:15:16,400

hide the pick in my ass

1349
01:15:16,500 --> 01:15:18,300


1350
01:15:18,300 --> 01:15:20,500

let me out of the car

1351
01:15:20,500 --> 01:15:22,700
The car is severely damaged.

1352
01:15:22,700 --> 01:15:25,500
The perpetrators appear to be
two heavyset males...

1353
01:15:25,500 --> 01:15:27,700
driving a blue Cutlass Supreme.

1354
01:15:27,700 --> 01:15:29,200

now we're takin' the lane

1355
01:15:29,300 --> 01:15:31,200


1356
01:15:31,200 --> 01:15:34,600

let me try to fill up your--

1357
01:15:34,700 --> 01:15:37,600
Let's go now to Mark in Skycop--

1358
01:15:39,400 --> 01:15:40,700
God damn it!

1359
01:15:42,500 --> 01:15:45,400
- Yeah?
- Hey, you guys!

1360
01:15:45,400 --> 01:15:47,000
- Fuck!
- It's Lee.

1361
01:15:47,000 --> 01:15:49,700
I'm just checkin' in.
Is everything OK?

1362
01:15:49,800 --> 01:15:51,800
Yeah, we're cool. We're super cool.

1363
01:15:51,900 --> 01:15:53,200
Ah! Ahh!

1364
01:15:53,200 --> 01:15:55,200
Um, where are you guys?

1365
01:15:55,200 --> 01:15:56,600
We're, uh, we're at the drive-in.

1366
01:15:56,700 --> 01:15:57,800
We're watchin this bitchin' movie.

1367
01:15:57,800 --> 01:15:59,700
It's, uh, Cop Chase 3.
Have you seen it?

1368
01:15:59,700 --> 01:16:04,700
Aaaaaah!

1369
01:16:04,800 --> 01:16:07,300
Uh, no. I haven't seen that one.

1370
01:16:07,400 --> 01:16:09,300
Whoa!

1371
01:16:09,400 --> 01:16:10,700
Sounds scary, though.

1372
01:16:10,700 --> 01:16:12,700
Yeah. Uh, it's really fucking scary.

1373
01:16:12,800 --> 01:16:14,800
I'm shaking right now, I'm so scared.

1374
01:16:14,900 --> 01:16:17,300
Cool. Well, how was that, uh...

1375
01:16:17,300 --> 01:16:19,300
big power meeting you guys had?

1376
01:16:19,400 --> 01:16:21,100
Awesome. I'll tell you about it later.

1377
01:16:21,100 --> 01:16:22,900
You're makin' us miss the movie.

1378
01:16:25,500 --> 01:16:27,400
I think I lost em!

1379
01:16:31,400 --> 01:16:33,000
Gaah!

1380
01:16:33,100 --> 01:16:36,000


1381
01:16:37,500 --> 01:16:39,300

spinnin' donuts, go!

1382
01:16:39,300 --> 01:16:40,900
I can do this.

1383
01:16:40,900 --> 01:16:41,900


1384
01:16:43,000 --> 01:16:45,100
-
- Nooo!

1385
01:16:45,200 --> 01:16:47,500
-
- Go!

1386
01:16:47,500 --> 01:16:50,500


1387
01:17:06,000 --> 01:17:08,100
We're gonna need
paramedics and fire trucks.

1388
01:17:08,100 --> 01:17:10,100
These guys are toast.

1389
01:17:16,600 --> 01:17:18,800
Let's get the fuck outta here.

1390
01:17:18,800 --> 01:17:20,700
Let's go.

1391
01:17:20,700 --> 01:17:23,200
Uh, which way, which way?

1392
01:17:23,200 --> 01:17:24,300
OK, where?

1393
01:17:24,400 --> 01:17:26,200
That way! That way!

1394
01:17:28,400 --> 01:17:30,500
This is it, I think.

1395
01:17:30,600 --> 01:17:33,200
Uh! Oooh! Uh!

1396
01:17:33,300 --> 01:17:35,500
- Lemme sneak a peek.
- OK.

1397
01:17:38,800 --> 01:17:41,400
Uh! Huh.

1398
01:17:41,400 --> 01:17:43,100
- This is it.
- Oh.

1399
01:17:46,300 --> 01:17:47,800
C’mon.

1400
01:17:47,900 --> 01:17:49,200
Oh, fuck.

1401
01:17:49,200 --> 01:17:51,200
- Let's do this.
- OK.

1402
01:17:52,400 --> 01:17:54,500
Hey. Hey.

1403
01:17:54,600 --> 01:17:55,800
Hey, guys, you're runnin' a little late.

1404
01:17:55,900 --> 01:17:57,700
There's one spot left.
You got any new material?

1405
01:17:57,800 --> 01:18:00,500
What we got's gonna turn
your brain into shit.

1406
01:18:00,500 --> 01:18:04,200
Dust off the stage,
open mic host. Step aside.

1407
01:18:05,300 --> 01:18:06,800
OK, big shots.

1408
01:18:06,800 --> 01:18:08,200
You're up whenever you're ready.

1409
01:18:08,200 --> 01:18:10,700
Let's blister this asshole.

1410
01:18:10,700 --> 01:18:12,900
Jack, wait! You got the pick?

1411
01:18:12,900 --> 01:18:14,200
Yeah. Got it right here.
Let's go.

1412
01:18:14,300 --> 01:18:17,200
Maybe I should use it tonight
and you use it next time.

1413
01:18:17,200 --> 01:18:18,900
I should use it tonight.
I'm the lead singer.

1414
01:18:18,900 --> 01:18:21,800
Huh! It's a guitar pick.
I'm lead guitar.

1415
01:18:21,900 --> 01:18:23,500
OK, dude, don't freak out on me.

1416
01:18:23,500 --> 01:18:25,400
Let's just work this out rationally, OK?

1417
01:18:25,400 --> 01:18:26,600
We'll take turns with it.

1418
01:18:26,600 --> 01:18:28,000
I'll use it now, you'll use it later.

1419
01:18:28,100 --> 01:18:30,700
I'm not freakin' out,
you're freakin' out.

1420
01:18:30,800 --> 01:18:33,500
Now, just let me hold it
for one second!

1421
01:18:33,500 --> 01:18:36,400
You're never gonna use
this fuckin' pick.

1422
01:18:37,600 --> 01:18:38,600
Aaah!

1423
01:18:38,600 --> 01:18:39,800
Aaaah!

1424
01:18:39,800 --> 01:18:41,800
- No!
- No!

1425
01:18:41,800 --> 01:18:43,700
You guys, the crowd's
gettin' restless in there.

1426
01:18:43,700 --> 01:18:44,700
- No!
- Hey, wh-what's--

1427
01:18:44,700 --> 01:18:46,500
What's goin' on?

1428
01:18:46,600 --> 01:18:48,200
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
what's wrong?

1429
01:18:48,200 --> 01:18:50,200
We can't go on.

1430
01:18:50,200 --> 01:18:52,600
We had the demon's pick...

1431
01:18:52,600 --> 01:18:53,700
but then we broke it...

1432
01:18:53,800 --> 01:18:56,700
and now our masterpiece
will never happen.

1433
01:18:56,700 --> 01:19:00,200
We can't pay the rent because
we won't be fueled by Satan.

1434
01:19:00,200 --> 01:19:02,500
Come on, get up, get up.

1435
01:19:02,600 --> 01:19:06,000
Come on, come on. Stand up.
You're all right.

1436
01:19:06,100 --> 01:19:10,000
You guys, having
some satanic guitar pick...

1437
01:19:10,000 --> 01:19:12,200
isn't gonna make
your rock any better...

1438
01:19:12,300 --> 01:19:14,900
because Satan's not
in a guitar pick...

1439
01:19:14,900 --> 01:19:16,500
he's inside all of us.

1440
01:19:16,600 --> 01:19:18,300
He's in here.

1441
01:19:18,400 --> 01:19:20,000
In your hearts.

1442
01:19:20,100 --> 01:19:22,900
He's what makes us
not want to go to work...

1443
01:19:22,900 --> 01:19:26,500
exercise, or tell the truth.

1444
01:19:26,500 --> 01:19:28,100
He's what makes us want to party...

1445
01:19:28,100 --> 01:19:30,600
and have sex with each other
all night long.

1446
01:19:31,700 --> 01:19:34,300
He's that little voice in your mind...

1447
01:19:34,400 --> 01:19:37,900
that says, "Fuck you"
to the people you hate.

1448
01:19:37,900 --> 01:19:40,800
Now, you can stay out here
and fight on the ground...

1449
01:19:40,800 --> 01:19:43,300
and cry like babies.

1450
01:19:43,400 --> 01:19:48,600
Or you can go in there
like friends and rock.

1451
01:19:50,100 --> 01:19:52,400
So, what's it gonna be?

1452
01:19:54,200 --> 01:19:57,800
Let's go in there and show 'em
what Tenacious D is all about.

1453
01:19:57,800 --> 01:19:59,100
Yeah.

1454
01:19:59,200 --> 01:20:02,500
I already got a guitar pick anyways.

1455
01:20:06,100 --> 01:20:07,800
C'mon.

1456
01:20:42,600 --> 01:20:44,800
Dude, we can still use the pick.

1457
01:20:44,800 --> 01:20:46,600
You use one half, I'll use the other.

1458
01:20:46,700 --> 01:20:47,900
There's still some juice
in there, probably.

1459
01:20:48,000 --> 01:20:48,900
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1460
01:20:49,000 --> 01:20:50,500
Where is that...?

1461
01:20:50,600 --> 01:20:51,800
Aaaah!

1462
01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:04,500


1463
01:21:04,600 --> 01:21:08,300


1464
01:21:08,300 --> 01:21:10,200


1465
01:21:10,200 --> 01:21:11,900


1466
01:21:11,900 --> 01:21:15,000

and my cock you will suck

1467
01:21:15,100 --> 01:21:17,100


1468
01:21:17,200 --> 01:21:19,000


1469
01:21:19,000 --> 01:21:22,900

and now you shall both die

1470
01:21:22,900 --> 01:21:30,000

you motherfucker

1471
01:21:30,600 --> 01:21:35,900

to a rock-off

1472
01:21:38,100 --> 01:21:42,900

to rock your socks off

1473
01:21:44,800 --> 01:21:50,200


1474
01:21:50,300 --> 01:21:53,700


1475
01:21:53,700 --> 01:21:57,600

a rock-off challenge

1476
01:21:57,700 --> 01:22:00,600


1477
01:22:00,600 --> 01:22:04,300


1478
01:22:05,800 --> 01:22:13,600

your sorry ass back to hell

1479
01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:22,400

to pay our rent

1480
01:22:24,900 --> 01:22:27,400


1481
01:22:29,400 --> 01:22:34,500

Kage back to Hell

1482
01:22:34,500 --> 01:22:35,600
What?

1483
01:22:35,600 --> 01:22:37,100
Trust me, Kage.

1484
01:22:37,200 --> 01:22:38,600
It's the only way.

1485
01:22:38,600 --> 01:22:40,000
What are you talking about?

1486
01:22:40,000 --> 01:22:43,700


1487
01:22:43,800 --> 01:22:45,400
Fine!

1488
01:22:45,400 --> 01:22:48,600


1489
01:22:48,600 --> 01:22:51,600
Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

1490
01:22:55,800 --> 01:22:59,700


1491
01:23:02,900 --> 01:23:06,900

it's fucking tasty

1492
01:23:10,700 --> 01:23:14,300

I can do what I want

1493
01:23:14,400 --> 01:23:17,500

I'm gonna flaunt

1494
01:23:17,500 --> 01:23:22,700

a rock-off that I've ever lost

1495
01:23:25,300 --> 01:23:28,700

Kage back to hell

1496
01:23:28,800 --> 01:23:32,700

with my hot demon's gel

1497
01:23:32,800 --> 01:23:36,400

like the Scarlet Pimpernel

1498
01:23:39,600 --> 01:23:42,100


1499
01:23:44,100 --> 01:23:45,200
Come on, Kage!

1500
01:23:45,200 --> 01:23:49,300
Let's fight his music with our music.

1501
01:23:49,400 --> 01:23:52,200

that we can win

1502
01:23:52,200 --> 01:23:54,900
-
- Listen to me.

1503
01:23:54,900 --> 01:23:59,100

because he's not a mortal man

1504
01:23:59,100 --> 01:24:00,200
Goddamnit, Kage.

1505
01:24:00,200 --> 01:24:03,300

his sex slave

1506
01:24:03,400 --> 01:24:05,400


1507
01:24:05,500 --> 01:24:07,000
- No.
-

1508
01:24:07,100 --> 01:24:10,000


1509
01:24:10,100 --> 01:24:14,100

through so much shit

1510
01:24:14,100 --> 01:24:16,700

with my dick

1511
01:24:16,700 --> 01:24:22,400

to blow this fucker down

1512
01:24:22,500 --> 01:24:25,700

it's time to blow doors down

1513
01:24:25,800 --> 01:24:28,900

it's time to blow doors down

1514
01:24:29,000 --> 01:24:31,900

it's time for a showdown

1515
01:24:31,900 --> 01:24:34,700

take ya to brown town

1516
01:24:34,700 --> 01:24:38,400

to blow this fucker down

1517
01:24:38,500 --> 01:24:41,300

if we do not blow doors down

1518
01:24:41,300 --> 01:24:43,700

to blow doors down

1519
01:24:43,800 --> 01:24:46,700

it's time for the smack down

1520
01:24:46,800 --> 01:24:49,700


1521
01:24:49,800 --> 01:24:51,300


1522
01:24:51,300 --> 01:24:52,900


1523
01:24:52,900 --> 01:24:56,000

and blow your mind

1524
01:24:56,100 --> 01:24:59,200

for all mankind

1525
01:24:59,300 --> 01:25:02,300

we hold the key

1526
01:25:02,300 --> 01:25:05,400

we are the D

1527
01:25:05,500 --> 01:25:07,600

we are the D, we are the D

1528
01:25:07,600 --> 01:25:10,600

we are the D, we are the D

1529
01:25:10,700 --> 01:25:13,100

we are the D, we are the D

1530
01:25:13,200 --> 01:25:16,200

we are the D, we are the D

1531
01:25:16,300 --> 01:25:19,200

we are the D, we are the D

1532
01:25:21,500 --> 01:25:22,900
You guys are fuckin' lame!

1533
01:25:22,900 --> 01:25:24,800
C'mon, Cake,
you're comin' with me.

1534
01:25:26,300 --> 01:25:28,800
Taste my lightning, fucker.

1535
01:25:28,800 --> 01:25:31,000
Nooo!

1536
01:25:31,000 --> 01:25:32,300
Ow!

1537
01:25:32,300 --> 01:25:34,900
Fuck! My fuckin' horn!

1538
01:25:36,000 --> 01:25:37,900
- Oh, no!
- From whence you came...

1539
01:25:38,000 --> 01:25:42,200
you shall remain,
until you are complete again!

1540
01:25:42,900 --> 01:25:46,600
Nooo!

1541
01:25:55,000 --> 01:25:57,200
Fuck you, Kage!

1542
01:25:57,200 --> 01:26:00,300
And fuck you, Jables.

1543
01:26:00,400 --> 01:26:04,400
I'll get you, Tenacious D!

1544
01:26:24,900 --> 01:26:28,300
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

1545
01:26:28,300 --> 01:26:29,600
We did it, dude.

1546
01:26:30,400 --> 01:26:32,400
We beat the Devil.

1547
01:26:32,500 --> 01:26:34,100
With our rock.

1548
01:26:34,200 --> 01:26:36,900
Ha ha ha! So good.

1549
01:26:36,900 --> 01:26:40,300
Aaah, man, that was
a monster jam that we played.

1550
01:26:40,300 --> 01:26:41,700
Yeah. Yeah.

1551
01:26:41,700 --> 01:26:44,800
It was, like,
the greatest song in the world.

1552
01:26:44,800 --> 01:26:45,900
It was, wasn't it?

1553
01:26:45,900 --> 01:26:48,800
- How did it go?
- One....

1554
01:26:51,500 --> 01:26:53,700
- I can't remember.
- Fuck. I can't either.

1555
01:26:53,700 --> 01:26:57,000
You know what? Let's just
lay down a fresh, tasty jam.

1556
01:26:57,000 --> 01:26:59,400
Good idea, rage Kage.

1557
01:26:59,400 --> 01:27:02,300
- Bust out the BOD.
- What?

1558
01:27:02,400 --> 01:27:03,900
The Bong of Destiny.

1559
01:27:03,900 --> 01:27:06,000
Good call.

1560
01:27:06,100 --> 01:27:07,700
Whoa.

1561
01:27:11,100 --> 01:27:12,900
Take it to the head, bitch.

1562
01:27:14,900 --> 01:27:16,400
Draws like a pencil.

1563
01:27:18,300 --> 01:27:20,300
Press record.

1564
01:27:21,800 --> 01:27:23,600
Ooooh!

1565
01:27:23,700 --> 01:27:26,400
- Ha ha ha!
- Yeah!

1566
01:27:26,400 --> 01:27:29,100
Now let's rock it.

1567
01:27:29,100 --> 01:27:30,500
One, two, three.

1568
01:27:30,600 --> 01:27:34,700

the Pick of Destiny, child

1569
01:27:34,700 --> 01:27:38,000

'cause it's fuckin' insane

1570
01:27:38,000 --> 01:27:42,100


1571
01:27:42,100 --> 01:27:46,000

a diamond on a platinum chain

1572
01:27:46,100 --> 01:27:49,900

there was a man named Kage

1573
01:27:49,900 --> 01:27:53,500

he was all the rage

1574
01:27:53,600 --> 01:27:57,200

and he taught him well

1575
01:27:57,300 --> 01:28:01,100

that were developed in Hell

1576
01:28:01,100 --> 01:28:04,600

and the power slide

1577
01:28:04,600 --> 01:28:08,300

now there's nowhere to hide

1578
01:28:08,400 --> 01:28:12,000

they named Tenacious D

1579
01:28:12,000 --> 01:28:14,800

the Pick of Destiny

1580
01:28:14,800 --> 01:28:18,800


1581
01:28:18,800 --> 01:28:22,200

'cause it's fuckin' insane

1582
01:28:22,200 --> 01:28:26,400


1583
01:28:26,500 --> 01:28:29,900

than a chicken chow mein

1584
01:28:30,000 --> 01:28:33,800

is easy to pleasey

1585
01:28:33,800 --> 01:28:37,300

must be loosey-goosey

1586
01:28:37,400 --> 01:28:42,200

be in my movie so come on!

1587
01:28:44,900 --> 01:28:48,600

had a battle royale

1588
01:28:48,600 --> 01:28:52,300

with an evil kapow

1589
01:28:52,300 --> 01:28:55,400

and thus the demon said, "Ow!"

1590
01:28:55,400 --> 01:28:59,600


1591
01:28:59,700 --> 01:29:02,800

'cause it's fuckin' insane

1592
01:29:02,900 --> 01:29:07,000


1593
01:29:07,100 --> 01:29:10,600

better than-a Citizen Kane

1594
01:29:10,600 --> 01:29:14,300

must live in my freezer

1595
01:29:14,300 --> 01:29:18,100

is full of malarkey

1596
01:29:18,200 --> 01:29:24,000

be in my movie so come on!

1597
01:29:35,800 --> 01:29:40,300

then go to Geneva

1598
01:29:40,400 --> 01:29:44,100

then suck on my boney

1599
01:29:44,100 --> 01:29:47,300

then get in my movie

1600
01:29:47,300 --> 01:29:51,400


1601
01:29:51,400 --> 01:29:55,700


1602
01:29:55,700 --> 01:29:56,100


1603
01:30:05,000 --> 01:30:06,800


1604
01:30:09,400 --> 01:30:10,900


1605
01:30:13,200 --> 01:30:15,700


1606
01:30:17,400 --> 01:30:20,900

were smite to the ground

1607
01:30:22,800 --> 01:30:25,700


1608
01:30:25,700 --> 01:30:30,100

stricken down to the ground

1609
01:30:31,400 --> 01:30:34,300


1610
01:30:34,300 --> 01:30:36,000
Ah ha ha ha!

1611
01:30:36,000 --> 01:30:39,700

thrown to the ground

1612
01:30:42,700 --> 01:30:47,100


1613
01:30:47,100 --> 01:30:48,900


1614
01:30:51,200 --> 01:30:55,500


1615
01:30:55,500 --> 01:30:57,800


1616
01:30:57,900 --> 01:30:59,900

diddle-iddle-iddle, iddle-ay

1617
01:31:00,000 --> 01:31:03,900


1618
01:31:04,000 --> 01:31:08,400

with a vicious blow

1619
01:31:08,400 --> 01:31:12,600


1620
01:31:12,600 --> 01:31:17,100

for why we do not know

1621
01:31:17,200 --> 01:31:20,700

tried to destroy the metal

1622
01:31:20,700 --> 01:31:25,700


1623
01:31:25,800 --> 01:31:29,700


1624
01:31:29,700 --> 01:31:34,300


1625
01:31:34,400 --> 01:31:38,300


1626
01:31:38,300 --> 01:31:42,700


1627
01:31:42,700 --> 01:31:46,800


1628
01:31:46,900 --> 01:31:52,600


1629
01:31:55,100 --> 01:31:56,700


1630
01:31:58,800 --> 01:32:00,900


1631
01:33:00,900 --> 01:33:02,800
All right, man.

1632
01:33:02,800 --> 01:33:04,400
This is it.

1633
01:33:04,400 --> 01:33:08,300
Don't make a sound
unless it's a masterpiece.

1634
01:33:08,300 --> 01:33:10,600
Not a fuckin' sound.

1635
01:33:12,500 --> 01:33:14,100
Wait.

1636
01:33:14,100 --> 01:33:15,900
How will I know if it's a masterpiece?

1637
01:33:17,300 --> 01:33:18,600
You'll feel it.

1638
01:33:18,600 --> 01:33:20,900
And if you feel it,
just fuckin' lay it on me.

1639
01:33:37,500 --> 01:33:39,400
Aaaah!

1640
01:33:39,500 --> 01:33:40,500
OK.

1641
01:33:54,200 --> 01:33:55,500
Thought I felt somethin'.

1642
01:33:58,000 --> 01:33:59,800
Let's hear that back.